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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Away With the Winddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: PastelSky
    ASL Info:    18/F/In the clouds
    Elite Ratio:    4.24 - 181/223/49
    Words: 52
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1070
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 402



    Description:
       I know the title sounds cliché. I was about to call it "Cast Away," but I think it's a little redundant like that.

    Anyways, please tell me your first impression of this poem and what you think it means. Thank you very much! Critique is always welcome ;D!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAway With the Winddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Cast away with the wind
    is what the hour clock says.
    Behold, a majestic bird soaring overhead.

    Cast away,
    with different destinations to pursue,
    and how old Eddie would look up
    from the pier.
    He'd say,
    "Cast away with the wind,
    that airplane."
    He'd say,
    "I don't need a ride today."




    Submitted on 2004-11-24 17:04:15     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      i'm not sure what to think of it... but that's because i don't quite get what's going on and i know nothing of Eddie...
    it's a bit sentimental, but it expresses emotion well... in the undercurrent of it all... it's written well... i see no fault with it.. just wish i really knew what it all means...
    | Posted on 2004-11-24 00:00:00 | by besodemuerte | [ Reply to This ]
      Well, this was interesting. Short and sweet.

    Nothing to complaine about- except...

    A little corny in my opinion.
    Sort of blurry, but that is fine, it is your writing and you cannot expect anyone else to fully understand it.
    | Posted on 2004-11-24 00:00:00 | by bloodwing | [ Reply to This ]


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