Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • ES Magazine
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • Video Tutorials
  • RolePlay
  • 90% off Amazon
  • Funny Pics
    • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
    • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Paintingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    32/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.05 - 6191/5840/522
    Words: 57
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 342
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 448



    Description:
       This is a work in progress.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Paintingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Somehow her painting looked perfect
    The beauty hid the sloppy strokes,
    The poor composition,
    The impossibility of the light
    Somehow her frail body
    Remained graceful with age
    Somehow her mind
    Defied her sadness
    Her scattered thoughts
    Remained innovative
    But she knew
    That artists either
    Use their madness constuctively
    Or let it take over and self-destruct




    Submitted on 2004-03-18 01:49:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow, thats really pretty, I am glad its a work in progress, because I wanted to keep reading... Great Job!
    | Posted on 2004-03-24 00:00:00 | by ViCiOuSWrItEr | [ Reply to This ]
      This was a good concept piece. The redundant use of the word "somehow" holds this poem back. Perhaps you can find more descriptive phrasing to convey the same meaning.

    This has poem has potential.
    | Posted on 2004-03-18 00:00:00 | by The Gadfly | [ Reply to This ]
      i dont really know what else to say but wow.. i really thought this was an awesome peice of work.. i mean im no expert but i know when i like something.. and me likey hehe
    | Posted on 2004-03-18 00:00:00 | by rocknpoetrychik | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?    		7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    3452



    Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
    5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

    [ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

    Google
     

    [ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
    [ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .
    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry