Description: I got the idea when I was taking out the trash... haha, I was thinking about how everything stops during a dream and everything else (especially logic) is forgotten. It's like a year could happen in a minute of your dreams!
I like the concept a lot, and I think it's cool how you can think about something so deep while doing something so thoughtless and not interesting (ie taking out the trash). Although I read the description before the poem, so therefore, already knew what the poem was supposed to be about, I could pretty much pick it up without having been told. Despite that fact, I did still get a little confused. I do understand it though. Describing dreams and how they can be anything your imagination can come up with...It reminds me of a quote from Dumbledore in the latest Harry Potter movie, I'm not sure if you're familiar with them or not, but here is the quote, "...For in dreams, we enter a world that is entirly our own. We could swim through the deepest ocean, or glide over the highest cloud..."
I like its simplicity. This is just one of those poems that I like to read again and again. It never loses its touch and your choice of words contributed to its beauty. Nice use also of rhyme and a unique rhyme pattern you have there. I love your poem so much. Keep it up
I got lost in this-in a wonderful way. Your imagery and ways of displaying actions are wonderful. Your rhyme hit the mark and made this a very relaxing poem to read. You are very much above simple; don't ever discredit yourself. This makes me want to dream all the time. Great use of your skills.
I like the rhyme scheme, kinda crazy. You kept the flow and syllable count pretty consistent, good job on that. The messege was simple yes, but it was also pretty, like Neverland and all that lolly-pop tree stuff... sorry, i'm just a bit bitter. Anyways, what's up with the last stanza? Is having 5 lines intentional?
BTW, thank you for your comment, appreciated deeply
Ideas spark at the most inconvenient times, no? Visually, I noticed your unique layout/structure as well as effective use of meter. You have exceptional rhyming skills and have demonstrated a mellifluous flow in that seems natural and intelligently advanced. Your writings, never cease to impress me! The fashion in which you write, challenges me to believe that you are merely 15 years of age! You are an ultimately talented composer and I have had the greatest of pleasures, as I view your fine works! Dreams are a theme in which greatly appeals to me, as I too tend to write much upon the subject… They are perplexing things, in which I have limited knowledge upon… it is a humanly commonality yet individual to each person. You have wonderfully illustrated the same notion in which the great Edgar Allan Poe, had once achieved to explain –that “dreams are not merely what they seem”… Have you read his short piece, entitled “A dream within a dream”? It is one of my favorites! I think you will be further intrigued by other works in which he had ingeniously composed. Dreams are indeed, boundless… as is your talent! oxox Snow white