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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Hidden Surrenderdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: secret moon
    Elite Ratio:    6.54 - 687/427/57
    Words: 43
    Class/Type: Misc/Love
    Total Views: 996
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 269



    Description:
       Just some weirdness I thought up. Not really a moment of inspiration, but a communication more like of the confusion inside me right now.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHidden Surrenderdots
    -------------------------------------------


    sdrawkcaB
    and then you laughed
    at the way I smiled
    c ook dly
      r     e
    the laugh faded
    and was gone
    in a
    s t r a i g h t
    fashion
    (goodbye
    star-
    laugher)




    Submitted on 2004-12-08 12:17:39     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Ah!! I love it. The free-format of this piece is so simple, and so simply said it almost took my breath away:O) I eespecially enjoyed the crookedly part. Haha, made me think of an eight year-old with missing teeth smiling at me, twas cute.

    I'm seeing your confusion in this piece, dear secret. If its about a boy then just say screw it and be happy! Nothing, not just boys, are worth your pain and sorrow if they wopnt help you take it away. Bury the dead dog, plant a shrub ontop and never try to shovel it up again, because then you're only killing the shrub that already started growing...(Haha believe it or not that was from Two and a Half Men)

    Anyway, this was an excellent piece secret, as always. I do think the last line in here is supposed to be laughter with a "t" though:O)

    --Kayla
    | Posted on 2004-12-14 00:00:00 | by Superman | [ Reply to This ]
      Well, this is very ee cummings. I like the crooked because my teeth are a little crooked, and i have two that sort of stick in front of the others similar to the way you typed it. I don't really understand the backwards because i don't understand what is backwards.
    | Posted on 2004-12-08 00:00:00 | by cuddledumplin | [ Reply to This ]
      very different took me awhile to see backwards, thought it was just gibberish at first then read it again and saw it... like the creativity in this one... might try it sometime
    | Posted on 2004-12-08 00:00:00 | by ceestyl | [ Reply to This ]
      Yeah i was completely LOST with this lol im sure it has meaning for you! but it is a lot of confusion and larrysgirl was right it should be called confusion lol
    | Posted on 2004-12-08 00:00:00 | by grinninggashes | [ Reply to This ]


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