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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Sweaterdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: ladiesplanet1
    ASL Info:    23.cali baby
    Elite Ratio:    3.58 - 720/463/165
    Words: 107
    Class/Type: Poetry/Alone
    Total Views: 614
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 668



    Description:
       This is the second one I wrote. I was in juvenile hall at the time and was totally stressed out.
    I really hope you like it.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSweaterdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm gonna need a sweater,
    To keep me warm inside.
    To warm up my heart,
    To give me much more time.

    Everybody's anger,
    Is rubbing off on me.
    All that I can say is,
    Please just let me be.

    I want to run away,
    To runaway from all my fears.
    But I'm gonna need some help,
    To wipe away my tears.

    All I want is someone,
    To love me for who I am.
    All I want is someone,
    Who can really understand.

    I'm gonna need a sweater,
    To keep me warm inside.
    To warm up my heart,
    To give me much more time.




    Submitted on 2004-12-09 12:01:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      You are very honest in your writing and that is very therapeutic for your soul also. It sounds like you've had a tough life up to this point and all you can do is have faith and keep putting yourself out there - it will get better, believe me. I liked the wording and simple flow and thought this was an endearing piece! Love,Peace,Joy! tif ; )
    | Posted on 2005-08-19 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      I like how you started and ended with the same stanza. I also like the reference of the sweater and how you use it as a metaphor. You are very talented. I loved this poem. You wrote it in juvee huh? i remember those days...? Why were you there...let me guess. YOU TRIED TO KILL SOMEONE? Or you tortured somebody. You're boy toy made you mad so you hung him by his toes and gagged him. than you sliced his nipples open didn't you...you sadist! Just kidding, but really, why were you there?
    | Posted on 2005-05-22 00:00:00 | by Samuel Bielz | [ Reply to This ]
      wow! I really like it! It's very original, and it is very simple. The object of the sweater is something i never would have thought of.
    | Posted on 2004-12-12 00:00:00 | by bluemayskye | [ Reply to This ]
      thoughts: I been there and done that, and I will tell you, you have one step on the adult side of life and one step on the childs side. This is such a hard time in your life but you will pull through because I feel you are strong in spirit.
    1) first you have to understand yourself before others can understand you. this is a long road and you must be prepared that you may never find understanding. But as long as you know whats it is in your heart then hold on to that.
    2) Never ever wait for someone to pull you out of your problems" someone to wipe away your tears", You are strong and you will be able to handle whatever comes your way. Just always be true to yourself as well with others. I know this sounds like a hard thing to do... I have been there I know! I feel for you, but not pity, this will make you stronger. Take my word on it. I wish you all the best of luck.
    Dana
    | Posted on 2004-12-09 00:00:00 | by raptures | [ Reply to This ]
      Awwww. I like this. It was simple. I like simplicity. I like how you used the first verse to come back into play at the end. I understand how you feel with this as well. It is great to have someone that will put their trust in you and like you for just being you. Too many people try to be like other people and it is hard to be yourself. But the trend has to start somewhere right? Be original. Always be yourself. Someone will eventually come along and appreciate it. Great write!
    | Posted on 2004-12-09 00:00:00 | by Munchie_1226 | [ Reply to This ]


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