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    dots Submission Name: Ten Yearsdots

    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 88
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 638
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 509


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    dotsTen Yearsdots

    So this is what ten years feels like.
    When we first met, I felt so new,
    now I feel so old.
    I've got a few gray hairs,
    a few pounds around my middle,
    s few secrets that weigh down my soul.
    It's like I cry even when I'm not crying.
    I wear my heart like an exposed nerve,
    Anything that strikes it causes pain.
    I have a hole that you left
    ever filling it is a dream,
    and all I want to know is why.

    Submitted on 2004-03-20 21:47:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Ah... sad,, but very nicely written. That last line echos something my mother said after her divorce. Lovely. <><
    | Posted on 2004-03-24 00:00:00 | by WorththeWait | [ Reply to This ]
      in reading this, i am glad i have adopted a 'it was good bad and over' policy. ten years is a long time to stay with someone. this poem, although probably accurate in its depiction of soul weight, lbs around the middle, and a few grays........i still would tend to think what i had 'gained,' and not literally. i say it now, as a young, naive lass, but it seems like something i will continue to say........i'd never let someone take more from me than i took from them, even if they did.

    neat write. loss and the like. but it still even has this tone of happiness to it. like bad and over..moving on. or maybe that is my warped perception. who knooows.

    | Posted on 2004-03-21 00:00:00 | by myghostsliketotravel | [ Reply to This ]
      Amy, this is one of your finest methinks---it just flows ---stream of conscious thoughts--into a pool of self doubt --that is "why"----horrendously haunting write--Thanks, Silver
    | Posted on 2004-03-21 00:00:00 | by Silverdog | [ Reply to This ]
    Nice write and I can relate to the words especially 'I have a hole that you left' funny how even finding someone new doesn't fill it up. Didn't find that line 5 interrupted the flow. Looks well controlled to me.
    | Posted on 2004-03-20 00:00:00 | by jaycee | [ Reply to This ]
      sad but very well written. nice wording. excellent write! keep up the excellent work!
    | Posted on 2004-03-20 00:00:00 | by painfullyme | [ Reply to This ]

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