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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Passionate Divadots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BenCollier
    Elite Ratio:    3.72 - 425/386/88
    Words: 90
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 1173
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 696



    Description:
       I simply am looking for an un biased opinion of this poem.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPassionate Divadots
    -------------------------------------------




    Vulnerability, that which is unrealized and seen
    Culpability, societal blindness and screen

    The tethered blossom, which covets a dream
    Abdication of resolve, thirst in a stream

    For the promise of devotion, renouncement of scorn
    Of precious moments, promises will reborn

    Innocence, parried, practiced and preached
    The forlorn heart, ruptured then breached

    Realization of growth, nurtured now delivered
    As archaic seeds, unearthed then bestrewed

    Effloresce her desires, my surrender, I need her
    There is no other, my passionate diva







    Submitted on 2004-12-10 16:19:31     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      what i like so much about this is the passion behind it. it is nice to see someone who looks beyound the "norm":

    Vulnerability, that which is unrealized and seen
    Culpability, societal blindness and screen

    it is too, too common that people do not see the true self of a person outside of traditional influences. this shows that you not only care about her but you actually SEE the real her. great poem!
    | Posted on 2005-02-28 00:00:00 | by stolie77 | [ Reply to This ]
      powerfully written, good useage of words ,not to mention the true devotion to your love.

    This was my fav part:

    The tethered blossom, which covets a dream
    Abdication of resolve, thirst in a stream
    | Posted on 2004-12-10 00:00:00 | by edthepoet | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    36941

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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