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    dots Submission Name: Infertile Mindscapedots

    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 55
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 618
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 362


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    dotsInfertile Mindscapedots

    My brain is fallow
    all of the carefully ploughed contours
    are full of sterile dust.
    A creative fire
    burned everything into desolation,
    so I sow thoughts
    as exotic as an alien world,
    water them with my tears,
    and wait to reap
    my strange crop of images
    that I may eat and renew my soul.

    Submitted on 2004-12-11 19:18:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      you paint beautifully, it's like i can see someome struggling to make a barren wasteland into a fertile garden.....

    Water them with my tears
    And wait to reap
    My strange crop of images

    It's like your emotions and wandering thoughts keep you working on better food for your soul....almost as if you constantly battle with your mind for your sanity.....

    Till next we mesh,
    | Posted on 2005-01-13 00:00:00 | by grigori | [ Reply to This ]
      I sat here a moment thinking and letting the poem soak in before writing this comment.

    It is not too often that I get such unusual feeling from a poem. Eating the crops of your brain that were watered from your tears. Very provoking. Am I sort of repulsed by the cannibal images this caused in my own dusty brain? A little. Am I facinated by the fantasic metaphor you created? Quite so.

    It is like when you see a painting that makes you feel kind of odd. You start to walk away and then turn back to look at it again, turning your head this way and that, stepping back to see it for farther away. (I am having a hard time expressing my feeling.) I guess what I am trying to say is that it made me react in a totally unexpected way. That is art. That is talent. You have a special ability.
    | Posted on 2004-12-23 00:00:00 | by angela~ | [ Reply to This ]
      this reads like a re-birth of the creative process. you have burned yourself out with creative explosion and are trying to re-sow the seeds for new creation. very nice, Amy. it is like a cycle that all of us poets go through constantly in our creative life. this is well written and full of creative death and rebirth!
    | Posted on 2004-12-12 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      "Water them for my tears"?? did you mean 'with my tears' or is that something I just don't understand??
    anyway I like this piece very much. it's crazy, yes, cause it's so original. you seem to have grown a lot of thoughts.
    'sterile dust' is an interesting image, a paradoxon. I like that.
    | Posted on 2004-12-12 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      heh, this is how I feel when I wake up slightly sick and hung over from a crazy night of 1) drinking and writing or 2) drinking and loving. Or more aptly, when it's about 5 in the morning and I haven't gone to bed yet, but the cigarettes are gone and the alcohol and hormones are settling down and I'm coming off a drunk high. Actually, I can think of a few other instances that don't involve mind-altering substances when I feel like this...

    ANYWAYS, you caught the feeling very well! I miss this feeling; it used to happen so often, but now I find it happening less and less.

    Favorite lines:
    "So I sow thoughts
    As exotic as an alien world
    Water them for my tears"

    I especially liked "Water them for my tears". I think it was a good bridge between the two lines starting with "So I sow" and the last 3 lines.
    | Posted on 2004-12-11 00:00:00 | by mixedemotions00 | [ Reply to This ]
      the arts have always been one of the most prominent healers throughout time. it's a good thing that there has never been a barren mind... there are some that farmers just don't touch and some underestimated by everyone else... but never barren. i believe that's one of the things that make us mere mortals beautiful.

    good job.

    a lot of people always enjoy the fruits of your labor. thank you for sharing your... um... crops.
    | Posted on 2004-12-11 00:00:00 | by ANGELO | [ Reply to This ]
      Haha this one was crazed. I like the originality tho for sure. I love that you wrote exotic and alien on the same line lol..Makes me think of a squinty eyed alien. lol Love the sterile dust part too. :) Sounds like you're sick of stange thoughts going through your mind.
    | Posted on 2004-12-11 00:00:00 | by graffitijeans | [ Reply to This ]
      I can see you in the flowing skirt, hips swirling, like Carmen Miranda, picking fruit from your head and eating it. You dance and offer some to the rest of us.
    You could actually develop many themes from the last lines, sort of like communion, that makes creating a very sacred act, and I believe it is. Only one thing, and that is the sound of "So I sow", I would use "Now I sow" but I know you have your reasons. These I really like:

    Water them with my tears
    and wait to reap
    My strange crop of images
    That I may eat and renew my soul.

    thanks for sharing , Hugs too
    | Posted on 2004-12-11 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]

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