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    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: near insanitydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: poetsoul
    ASL Info:    17/f/cali
    Elite Ratio:    2.47 - 109/151/32
    Words: 126
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 404
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 904



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsnear insanitydots
    -------------------------------------------


    near insanity-
    cover your ears,
    to drown your confusion.
    take your dull knife
    cut yourself deeper.
    imagine the tortured near death screams,
    of your future victims....
    then get off on it.
    you cant hide yourself anylonger,
    your starting to show.
    theres this look in your eyes,
    pure hate and wanting.
    so you cover your walls with pictures of diseased vagina's,
    it allways did fascinate you.
    try and cover the stench of rotting animals
    you used for practice....
    its not time yet.

    insanity-
    take your dull knife
    cut into her deeper.
    hear your latest victims tortured near death screams....
    and then get off on it.
    chew at the straight jacket,
    and laugh in amusement
    at the memory of warm dark red blood.....
    your there.




    Submitted on 2004-12-14 17:59:31     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      more emtion. yes that is what it needs more discriptive words to display stonger agressive emtion. it sound as if your mind is madding, and your emering yourself in it. lutting go. its better then bottling up. keep writing and focuse on the words your using to discribe these things. over all i liked it.
    | Posted on 2004-12-14 00:00:00 | by snufthepunk28 | [ Reply to This ]
      You know, I actually kind of like it. I mean, it does have a lot of [probably deliberate] shock value, and the material is awfully disgusting...But somehow I just like it. You did well dividing the lines, and I like the repetition.
    | Posted on 2004-12-14 00:00:00 | by Shuurinakisame | [ Reply to This ]



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