This site will self destruct in 2 months, March 17.
It will come back, and be familiar and at the same time completely different.
All content will be deleted. Backup anything important.
--- Staff
Roleplay Cloud -
 

Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

Allow Me


Author: arkay
ASL Info:    50+/m/Atl.Can
Elite Ratio:    4.84 - 450 /320 /56
Words: 25
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 1117
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 161



Description:


I think my words are drying up.
I offer this tanka until I get lubed. ;)


Allow Me





Show me of wonders
Never seen on this earth.
Take me to places
No man’s ever been before.
Allow me into your heart.




Submitted on 2004-12-20 07:37:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  This is a short but very meaningful poem. You have really said so much in so few words and even though it is short in length it is deep with sentiment. This is a very sweet poem but could be scary to travel to places unknown to man hee hee! Love can have a strange effect on some people, I have noticed. Yet, it is still a wonderful feeling to be in love and better to experience it than not I suppose. Just make sure you wear your seatbelt. haha! I dont believe I have ever read anything by you before and perhaps I shall visit again. Take care.

Lorna
| Posted on 2006-02-09 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]
  A deceptively simple tanka, and theme.
Both sound so obviously simple...open your heart...write 5 lines.
Neither is easy at all, as most of us have learned through living.
I loved the earlier comment ...made me hear Cpt. Kirk: 'boldly go where no man has gone before'! ;)
Although, that's really depressing when you get below the surface of it; to have a heart that's never been fully recognized must be a lonely existence.
Thanks for a good tanka; I needed that.
Happy Holidays to you and yours, arkay.
| Posted on 2004-12-20 00:00:00 | by latentlylyrical | [ Reply to This ]
  hey
yes it is very simple and to the point .. thts obvious and absolutely unnecessary to state again but ohwell..
i liked it.
neways yer it is short but if you're like me it takes quiet a bit of effort to actually write 5 lines! (:p) especially some tht make sense and r enjoyable to read lol.

basically what im saying is tht this was a nice write.
although i little bit more wuld be a tad better.
but its funi cuz it doesnt seem unfinished.

gd write
love anoutia
¤~*~xXx~*~¤
p.s culd u comment on my latest write 'nostalgia' or 'your love can save me'? i would like some comments (:p) hehe

take care happy holidays!
| Posted on 2004-12-20 00:00:00 | by Clementina oso | [ Reply to This ]
  short poems are never bad poems. there ones you can enjoy over and over again
good job.
hope i see another of you works soon
| Posted on 2004-12-20 00:00:00 | by kiki402 | [ Reply to This ]
  Hey there. Simple and to the point, just the way I like it. As always you write things that convey an easy to understand message without saying so much that the reader becomes confused. Anyhoo...much love to ya and happy holidays!
| Posted on 2004-12-20 00:00:00 | by Juliets_dagger | [ Reply to This ]
  Hi I dont think its simple. Cuz there is message hidden in it if I am not wrong, if I am correct me.
A beautiful poem told in few word.
With lots of love
shabnam
| Posted on 2005-01-12 00:00:00 | by shabnam | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



38602