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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Bruising Broken Bonesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Jester_Gesture
    ASL Info:    23/f
    Elite Ratio:    3.41 - 365/459/201
    Words: 198
    Class/Type: Poetry/Friendship
    Total Views: 890
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1130



    Description:
       This is for Kail. Originally it was titled 'Yellow Umbrella', but I thought I'd get in trouble for that title because no one here knows what it means. I honestly think this is a sweet piece, just like the sweet boy, because it gives him everything he deserves: something better.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBruising Broken Bonesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Jabs in the night;
    We always seem to fight.
    Turning burning away our
    sorrows and plights.
    You told me I was special,
    and said you'd never let me go.
    You said someday when you grow up,
    you'll find a way to love me and
    let me know.
    We stood in the drizzle dark,
    by all gruesome trucks parallel parked.
    Talking about the way things are,
    your family, school, the beauty of the stars.
    Spinning and winning your smiles
    it's all I need to go on for a while.
    I couldn't live without one embrace
    that catches me after the chase
    and turns to put a smile on my face.
    There's only one way to thank you,
    as I'm driving home.
    My hands grip my knees tightly
    bruising broken bones.
    I don't know when hands turned to fists,
    I don't know why I feel like this.
    So stabbed by a joke,
    a long loved friend.
    My only thank you is to pray and hope
    they won't make this your end.





    Submitted on 2004-12-24 03:36:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
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    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      It is a good poems, but i got a little confused near the end of it. now did someone die or get hurt really bad? My favorite line in his is" bruising broken bones"
    good write

    ~liz~
    | Posted on 2005-05-07 00:00:00 | by Fadingperson | [ Reply to This ]
      Is this the Kail that was in the hopsital last year? He looks really young in the pic (if that's him). How old is he?

    I liked the poem. I'm not sure I get it exactly, but I liked it. Is it about you and him, or him and his mom?
    | Posted on 2004-12-28 00:00:00 | by AngelOutlaw | [ Reply to This ]
      Good piece, i liked how you sued your words. SOme are simple everday used words, but they sound so eloquently written, and still osme other comparisons and linkeness are so well thought out. I'm sure your firend woud liek t his poem, so many deserve somethign better.
    | Posted on 2004-12-24 00:00:00 | by Mercy December | [ Reply to This ]
      Pretty good... Yellow Umbrella? I guess its best not to know. Do I feel a sense of tension in this relationship mentioned, or is it just too late (or early in the morning if you want to get technical.
    | Posted on 2004-12-24 00:00:00 | by JR Hoodlum | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem was very good until the end, you made the reader go what? one should never do that in a poem or a story. this part is what I am talking about:

    My hands grip my knees tightly
    bruising broken bones.
    I don't know when hands turned to fists,
    I don't know why I feel like this.
    So stabbed by a joke,
    a long loved friend.
    My only thank you is to pray and hope
    they won't make this your end
    | Posted on 2005-01-09 00:00:00 | by edthepoet | [ Reply to This ]


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