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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Pills to Your Advantagedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 149
    Class/Type: Poetry/Trapped
    Total Views: 1097
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 940



    Description:
       This is about this guy who I have known forever, he was in my sisters class and he is like six years older than me, somehow we were hanging out tonight and on the ride home he gave me loritab and I am pretty sure he was "using them to his advantage". Makes me kinda dissapointed because I always thought he was so cool.


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    dotsPills to Your Advantagedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Alcohol on your breath
    desire in your eyes
    such pretty colors
    but your such a decieving guy

    much to old
    and much to mature
    as you place your hands on my legs I remain unsure

    what are your intentions as you pass me these pills
    what are you thinking and what is this that I feel

    You make me sick and sadly I am temtped
    taken advantage of and slightly twisted

    pills to your advantage
    dizziness inside
    you whisper for me to come closer and seduce me with your eyes

    both in the backseat
    hidden from the public eye
    to close to alone
    I fear what you hide

    the car comes to a halt, I can now walk away
    the choice is taken
    I suffer no pain

    barely an escape
    dissapointment setting in
    I barely walk away
    will you try this again?




    Submitted on 2004-12-28 00:24:40     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I love the realism espoused by the near desire to give in even though the thought of it is repulsive. You never sound outright angry, per se, just upset and disturbed... very, VERY well written about a subject that is very unsettling.
    | Posted on 2005-01-21 00:00:00 | by jer | [ Reply to This ]
      this was a very good piece. It was well written and the flow was great. I agree with borderlintears you really do need to tell someone, because it could happen to someone else. That would not be a good thing. I"m really sorry this happened to ya and i hope your well.
    Good luck with your situation.

    cheers
    mikki
    | Posted on 2004-12-28 00:00:00 | by MiKkI25 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is awful. You need to tell someone about him using that on you. Just think - he could do it to one of your friends or someone you know. Guys like that are dicks. I'm sry this happened to ya. Good write though. I hope you never find yourself in that situation again. Good luck.
    -blt
    | Posted on 2004-12-28 00:00:00 | by borderlinetears | [ Reply to This ]
      I am sorry to here you went through this those kind of people make me sick. Anyways this is very well written. this is the best between the two poems i read of yours good job.
    | Posted on 2004-12-28 00:00:00 | by EL | [ Reply to This ]
      very calmly written. i feel no rage but a questioning and i hope that u get your answers. i am sorry this happen to u. but u have chose to deal with it in this amazing way. somethings are best written down.
    | Posted on 2004-12-28 00:00:00 | by whyme | [ Reply to This ]
      I am really sorry to hear that you went through this but am glad that you were safe in the end..well written..i dont have any suggestions :)
    | Posted on 2004-12-28 00:00:00 | by stormyskies | [ Reply to This ]
      very well written and described.. you know how to put your feelings toegether in an amazing form.. never lose that.. as an advice from someone who probably is no body .. take care for who you choose its in the end your life you lose
    | Posted on 2004-12-28 00:00:00 | by Tarek Refaat | [ Reply to This ]
      i liked this peice a lot. it's good that you can get out your feelings in your writing. i liked how it was calm, most people probably would have written it with a lot of anger. you did good on the description as well. im sorry that it happened though, at least that's as far as it went. great job on the write.
    | Posted on 2004-12-28 00:00:00 | by _Joeysgirl_ | [ Reply to This ]


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