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    dots Submission Name: love to suffer fromdots

    Author: runaway_poet
    ASL Info:    21/m/limbo
    Elite Ratio:    6.2 - 42/41/21
    Words: 428
    Class/Type: Poetry/The pain inside
    Total Views: 791
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 907

       this is peice i made from pain that was given to to me reasons i dont know but i know there are other people who has endured the pain and i like to her from people who can realate and enjoyed my post

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotslove to suffer fromdots

    her eyes portray hevons grace
    i can still recall that loving face
    and her angelic voice
    our stupid choice
    but now my heart is a pile of splinters
    im a child that has endured too
    many winters
    i was proud i made her stand tall
    now she is the one who makes me
    feel small
    she filled me with so much pride
    now from her i now hide
    now her eyes to me are of hate i can
    only ask why
    she was the only one who made me

    now all i want to do is slip away
    and die.

    Submitted on 2005-01-05 09:43:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      wow...uhhhh very different
    this girl really must have hurt you bad to do this to you i had a guy do that to me before well its really good keep it up
    | Posted on 2005-01-05 00:00:00 | by UNunderStood | [ Reply to This ]
      Just curious about a few things. first, what is hevons? i'm too lazy to pull up my on line dictionary.

    and second is this about a female/lover, or are you speaking of your mother?

    Sorry for seeming daft and not quite understanding your write but perhaps with a little more information I can grasp the full meaning.
    | Posted on 2005-01-05 00:00:00 | by Brownsdelight | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this it was quite unstructured but the meaning was there. I wasn't sure about the line, "now from her i now hide" maybe you could lose one of the nows or put "but I can see she lied" I don't know just some thoughts.
    | Posted on 2005-01-05 00:00:00 | by Broken Dreams | [ Reply to This ]
      this is a good poem. but it left me with questions. I guess sometimes it is good to do that...I understood it and everything...to me it sounds like a mother/daughter relationship...or I don't know...lol...but it is really good!
    | Posted on 2005-01-05 00:00:00 | by MyKemicalfailur | [ Reply to This ]

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