Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Washed Up (The Tsunami Prayer)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Lady Tragedy
    ASL Info:    15/F/Not Where You Are
    Elite Ratio:    3.66 - 87/66/14
    Words: 99
    Class/Type: Poetry/Death
    Total Views: 943
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 639



    Description:
       This is dedicated to anyone impacted by the tsunamis in Asia. It is a prayer as-said by a young boy who lost his mother in the disaster.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWashed Up (The Tsunami Prayer)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    God, are you mad at us?

    Daddy says Mommy's not coming home
    He says she's washed up with the sea
    But I don't understand
    She said she'd always be there for me

    God, are you listening?

    I want my mommy back
    So we can play hide-and-seek
    I have never seen my Daddy cry
    But now his tears are washed up on his cheek

    God, are you with her?

    Tomorrow is my birthday
    And then I will be seven
    I already feel wise
    'Cause I know Mommy's washed up, up, up...
    Washed up into heaven.




    Submitted on 2005-01-09 19:14:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I like this one, I feel the same way about the tsunamis. You should add a little more to it so you can get more emotion into it. I was already shedding tears by the time I reached the part where you say 'God, are you listening?' I wish the world could see this poem . . . It would show that people really do have hearts . . .
    | Posted on 2005-02-03 00:00:00 | by WindEmpress | [ Reply to This ]
      Beautiful. Absolutly beautiful. The last stanza especially captured my heart. Wonderful piece, wonderful words and an amazing flow. Lovely.
    | Posted on 2005-01-22 00:00:00 | by Emma_closes | [ Reply to This ]
      wow. This is wonderful. Very sad, yet beautiful. I think you did a wonderful job on this. The whole thing is so sad with so many people dieing, and I can't imagine how many children are feeling like this...but I do think god is there, and listening. wonderful poem!
    | Posted on 2005-01-09 00:00:00 | by MyKemicalfailur | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow what a wonderful thing you have written.

    I know being a guy im not suppose to have tears but this made my eyes watery.
    Well written I applaud you. I felt sad for this little boy.

    Peace and Harmony
    Shawn
    | Posted on 2005-01-09 00:00:00 | by armand | [ Reply to This ]
      well done very insightful and also good perceptiveness and style keep the good work up I to pray for those who were impacted by the Tsunami
    | Posted on 2005-01-09 00:00:00 | by littlepoet | [ Reply to This ]
      My eyes got all teary. It so sad when its like little children speaking about there mom or dad thats in heaven. Its a real good way to keep someone reading the poem. my heart goes out to them. I love it
    | Posted on 2005-01-09 00:00:00 | by Hazel eyes Jess | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    41281

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    The World written by jjd
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry