This wasn't just good, it was more like excellent. It flowed and I really enjoyed the lines. Especially the "hands holding on, heart letting go." Isn't that the way it always is. Mentally and emotionally we want so badly to end it all and let go but our physical being won't let us. I hope that made sense. I enjoyed this piece more because I could relate to it. Sounds like something I'd write. We could get along. :o) ~BCute
WOW! You realy had me going...You way of writing happens to be one of my favourite structures in terms of poetry. The way you convey your feelings is quite tangible and powerful though complex for the average reader. It is truly poetry. Well done.
wow! this is a terrific piece, full of great imagery & emotion. anderson was a REALLY sick dude, and 'the match girl' is without a doubt, the saddest story i've ever read. this has that same quality; the reader can feel her sadness. good job here. my only nit is with the last lines of the stanzas. don't think you need to repeat words.
Of her own sentiments Of her own fears
Of her own sentiments her own fears
the same for the stanzas that follow-of course, it's your work. other than that very minor thing, this is wonderful work. :-)
This is really good. It's very deep and it flows so well. You can really feel the pain as you read. "Her hands holding on Her heart letting go" I loved these two lines, they just make more sense then you realize...