Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

This I Swear


Author: ForsakenAngel
ASL Info:    19/F/Arkansas
Elite Ratio:    6.37 - 147 /73 /18
Words: 110
Class/Type: Poetry /Angry
Total Views: 1957
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 574



Description:


I wrote this last night when I was really pissed off at my best friends ex-boyfriend because he made her cry. This is my way of expressing my anger towards him since she made me promise not to kill the sorry excuse of an asswhole. I have always been over protective of her even though she is older than me. I swear if I ever have to see or hear that she got hurt by him he won't live to see another day. I know I am just being a cold hearted Bitch right now, but I could really care less. He is a FUCKING ASSWHOLE!!!


This I Swear



If you hurt her,
this I swear upon you
Death...

If you make her cry,
this I swear upon you
Death...

If she fells even 1 ounce of pain,
this I swear upon you
Death...

If I see even 1 tear,
this I swear upon you
Death...

This I swear with my life.
It will not be quick and easy
but painful as painful may come.

You must suffer...
As she has suffered.

This I swear with my life.




Submitted on 2005-01-18 15:06:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  lol. Sorry, I don't mean to laugh. But I'm that protective over a few VERY close friends of mine. I know that one of them is older then me, and hes a guy, but I don't care. If anyone touches them they die! I really liked the poem, a little repetitive (sorry, no spelling skills for me.), but I think it got your point across well. Thanks for writing, write more soon!
| Posted on 2005-02-14 00:00:00 | by TDALBH | [ Reply to This ]
  This poem makes me think about a friend protecting a friend or a sister protecting a sister. I like it. You must have been thinking about a friend or sister that you really care about when you wrote this. I know what it's like for someone to protect me. I have those experiences. I have four older brothers and two older sisters. So you know that they did and still do a lot of protecting me. I do the same thing when it comes to my three nieces and my two nephews. I can't help but to worry about them. I also do the same thing for my two really close friends. They aren't on here though. They don't write like I do. Keep up the good work.
| Posted on 2005-02-06 00:00:00 | by manda_bear | [ Reply to This ]
  Wow it definately was written better than i thought at first lol. Anyway it was good and i understand where you are coming from, i've got alot of friends who are girls and i never want to see them cry unless its bc of a sad movie or something like that. If its over a guy, that guy is definately going to be in pain bc i will beat the living [censored] out of him until he crys and i'll let him know that the tears he crys aren't for the beating he is taking but they are for her and the hurt he has caused her. Oh and sorry but i figured someone should let you know that in the fith stanza you spelt "not" wrong you typed "noy" but typing in a fit of anger i guess can do that to you lol. Well i liked it keep it up, i believe the best writings come from those extremely emotional times.
Chon
| Posted on 2005-01-31 00:00:00 | by xPoetxBoyx | [ Reply to This ]
  aww In a way its sweet that you love your friend that much. Guys are always gonna be asswholes though thats just the way they are. I personally just let them be crul to me and just show kindness back b/c that kills more than the physical pain although i have to admitt there are those that really should be tourtured. JUst be there for your friend when she needs you. Your a friend everyone needs. Because to me it sounds like you are there for her through tears of joy and sorrow! Awesome job!
Hannah
| Posted on 2005-01-18 00:00:00 | by Devils Angel | [ Reply to This ]
  so...you must be pretty close to this person? i mean, it's great...all the pretectiveness of it all. bad thaings in relationships happen...and you want to kill this kid...what are you really gonna do? stuff happens, don't you know that...and if the guy is a complete jerk...ur friend should get out of the relationship. can you really call that situation suffering on her part? it just seems like a weird reason for wishing death on a person.

-austin-
| Posted on 2005-01-18 00:00:00 | by austin | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



42655