Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • ES Magazine
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • Video Tutorials
  • RolePlay
  • 90% off Amazon
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Flooddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: elitegundam
    ASL Info:    25/M/Canada
    Elite Ratio:    3.25 - 68/90/20
    Words: 204
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 268
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1291



    Description:
       writen on 10/04/04
    lol, this peom is pretty self-descriptive. I was really depressed while writing it, and tried to get my feelings out through writing. My first real poem.
    Any kind of feedback for this peom is welcome.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFlooddots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm standing at the edge of an ocean
    One look is all it takes.
    It's not water I'm looking at,
    Fear, pain, and suffering are
    crashing against the shore
    Waves powered by hate, driven by anger.
    The world around me's a flood.
    Why an I on an island
    There's no hope left to stand on
    hte love is gone; my protection
    What's left to stop me
    from becoming one with the mud?
    Is this a nightmare, or reality...
    Is there a difference anymore
    The rain, when did it start?
    Drops of desperation and hopelessness.
    A flash of insanity lights the sky,
    Why didn't I see the darkness?
    Alone, cold and wet, the emotions overcome me.
    Is this a dream; Will I awake?
    Is there anything to live for if I do?
    One word, one name, is it enough?
    Can I love this person,
    or am I with them only to stay alive?
    Can I ever be happy
    when I've never known happiness?
    How can I stop the rain?
    where does the water end?
    Is it my fate to drown here?
    What happens if I wake up?
    Life is full of questions,
    and I'm just one person,
    alone on a quest for the answers




    Submitted on 2005-01-20 13:14:55     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i like this, i think that there are some puncuation things you can fix. also i am not one for so many question within a poem, however i think this one did a pretty good job of it. the idea of this is a good one in that it's full of emotion and nicely described. i love the comparison you used with the weather**
    | Posted on 2005-01-25 00:00:00 | by _winky_ | [ Reply to This ]



    Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
    5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

    [ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

    Google
     

    [ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
    [ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .
    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry
    This user has been inactive for more than 5 days.