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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Looking Throughdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: the apocrypha
    Elite Ratio:    3.37 - 185/192/48
    Words: 65
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 964
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 491



    Description:
       Don't really know how to describe this. Written a week ago or so...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLooking Throughdots
    -------------------------------------------


    This world
    This world, a bubble
    This world
    This world's probable
    Demise
    Will follow
    Soon
    Demise will swallow
    This world

    ...a river of tears
    And an eye that can't see
    This world's complexity
    This world and its lies
    This world

    This world, a deep, primal cry
    A womb, a tunnel
    Of blinking lights
    This world is a barrel
    Of a gun that fires




    Submitted on 2005-01-21 05:38:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I quite like it actually...And i dont think that you have hidden anything in it ...I think that you say exactly what you think this world is ...Its got a really nice and natural flow to it too ...the way you have set it out just makes the words hit home a little more...I thought it was great ...Good Job
    | Posted on 2005-01-21 00:00:00 | by Krysti | [ Reply to This ]
      interesting, I don't think that its exactly perfectly clear what your implying that this world is, but maybe thats the point, it opens up a most interesting field of speculation that I have maybe not so naturally have not
    previously got into very deeply.
    Good job though, sometimes feelings just burble out, and the end prodect is either good or a crap load of rambles, but this was pretty good, maybe jsut a bit more clarifaction on what you are saying what the world is. either then that...good good..

    ~Anarius~
    | Posted on 2005-01-21 00:00:00 | by Anarius | [ Reply to This ]


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