Description: Someone once asked me why I don't empty ash trays very often. I wrote this and hung it on the wall over my trash can.
Why I Chain Smoke -------------------------------------------
i hate emptying my ash trays
this is not so much out of some level of laziness
of which i have been considerably blessed
but for aesthetic reasons
for nothing looks so lonely as one solitary cigarette butt
lying spent on its side in an otherwise empty ashtray
amidst the dispersed ashes of cigarettes past
like some carcinogenic secret elephant burial ground
as i wistfully gaze at my lonely used filter
crushed callously into a quasi-cylindrical wad
i light another stick of cancer
and hurriedly absorb the nicotine goodness
so as to donate a partner for the lonely butt
don't worry, as someone who suffers from acute loneliness
i feel your pain
poor little fella
now ya got me thinking how badly I do need to quit but what would I do when I write, I can't bite my fingernails. What would I do when I drive I suppose I could bite my finger nails then but then what would I do when I smoke...die very nice write, some excellent metaphors and delivered well. lamemansterms(go read my new one )
I remember reading this one the first week I joined ES, though for some reason I failed to leave a comment at the time. I just hit the faves button for this one, because I thought this is really one of those rare, tongue-in-cheek looks at a topic that is much maligned. Cigarettes are so often characterized as "death sticks" or "cancer sticks" and to me that's just so insensitive! I mean, don't these little guys give up their lives for us? My brave little soldiers, all lined up and ready for inspection! They are rarely out of formation. And once they're spent, it seems tragic to leave them lying there all alone, crumpled and spent!
if poets like to read other poems because they are self absorbed and are looking for something that reminds them of themselves, this poem rules. i don't chain smoke, but your poem reminds me of Austin and my mother, so i find comfort in it. i love the secret elephant burial line and the seemingly random phrasing, like its just one lonely chain of thought to go with your chain of smoke. great job.
i always like to look at hings like this and try to get into the minds of a chain-smoker. i am a non smoker. never have. never could. even if it tasted of bbq chicken and cleansed our souls i would not want to, because i just associate it with so many clichés of artists and pseudo artists and wannabe artists; and this is of any artform across the board. it just is not as cool as everyone seems to think it is. anyway, this is a novel piece in a sense and i like the way you look at the cigarette. i too enjoyed the following: 'amidst the dispersed ashes of cigarettes past like some carcinogenic secret elephant burial ground'
in my opinion this is not particularly poetic but more poker faced, and i think it works better when choosing the subject you do. on the flipside to your observation, dont you think it is just disgusting to look at a whole ashtray full to the brim with cigarette butts? does it not make you want to cough your lungs out of your mouth? though on a different level maybe i would do the same were i a smoker, and i think about things like this from time to time. perhaps it is like a collection, and to get rid of the remains would be like destroying time to a degree. i always collect things, almost obsessively sometimes, and it acts like a journal and tells strories of times gone by; and i like that.
im basically just spouting a load of sh-it on your page, and for that i aapologise, but it is your piece that has got me doing so. i think the fact that i hate it so much makes it intriguing to me, and i want to prove to myself that i really would not be the same were i in the same situation; and that i will never know.
lol a butt is a poor little fella? but at some point this lonely butt will have too many friends and they'll end up throwing a party and trash the place which is no good because they dont have little hands to pick up all their trash lol... i dunno, i'm just babbling.
Great poem. I really like the fact that you've given something as common as a cigarette butt an emotion, and used excellent word selection to express this emotion, and the reaction to its' being lonely. Funny, very well written, and extremely enjoyable to read. Definately a poem to share with other people who smoke!
hehe...this is great...never thought of it that way...no i feel bad emptying my ashtray...poor little lonely cigarette butt...lol...i think thats funny that you hung it over your trash can...lol...now i need to smoke a cigarette so my other one isnt lonely...its amazing the weird things we write sometimes...i love this though...i wrote a poem about coffee and how it horrible when someone doesn't know how to make good coffee and people have to suffer through drinking it...well anywho...purps
Wow! I actually have chills on this one. LMAO. This is wonderful! On surface this looks like a simple piece, but I know better. You have honed this one, carefully spending each word.
for nothing looks so lonely as one solitary cigarette butt lying spent on its side in an otherwise empty ashtray amidst the dispersed ashes of cigarettes past like some carcinogenic secret elephant burial ground
You have a very creative mind.
i light another stick of cancer and hurriedly absorb the nicotine goodness so as to donate a partner for the lonely butt
From one chain-smoker to another (how can you write without nicotine?) I'm loving this one.
don't worry, as someone who suffers from acute loneliness i feel your pain poor little fella
Nice touch on the "little fella". This takes the edge off of the almost melancholy feeling and kinda puts the tongue back in cheek. Still, this is deeper than it might appear.
That is hilarious and I can totally relate. I smoke like a fiend, too on occation and feel compelled to give the "little fella" a friend as well... I loved this!
very creative. I would never have thought of writing about cigarettes even though I smoke. I love the way you liken the loney butt to your own loneliness. nice work.
I also love the concept to this. I didn't see no errors. Only you make want to put a punctuation mark at the end of every para or at the end of the write. But you don't have to listen to me. Well good write/ stephanie
I love the concept of finding a reason to do something, and i feel in this instance it is very well done. I love the thought of finding the cigarette butt lonely. Everytime I see an ash tray from now on I'm probably going to end up remembering this poem! Great stuff.
Submission Name: Why I Chain Smoke
