Preppy People Unite! by painofthanatos

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Submission Name: Preppy People Unite! dots

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Author:	painofthanatos
Elite Ratio:	4.32 - 684/571/86
Words:	336

Class/Type:	Poetry/Comedy
Total Views:	1285
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	2072

Description:
okay, random nasty tangent about stupid stupid people. and to the person after whom the first line was said by - i'm sorry. this isn't about you! i promise.

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Preppy People Unite! dots

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Oh My Gawd!
Today is like sooo friggin horrible
Look at my butt, it looks like so huge in these jeans
And then I lost the shoelaces to my sandals
I couldn't find the keys to my porsche
Then I remembered I had put them in my Louis Vuitton bag
It just kept getting worse!

By the time I got to second period
I couldn't even remeber where I put my pencil
And then my best friend told me it was in my hand
I felt soooo silly!
I forget everything
Like this one time I forgot that the cheerleading squad was wearing baby pink
And I wore...pink. just pink. no baby pink.
Just pink.
I. Was. Humilitated.

I spent all of lunch searching for my tic tacs
By the time lunch ended I still hadn't found them
I ended up finding them in 6th period
I was so hungry I ate two
TWO!
I felt like such a heffer!
Of course I had to run to the bathroom and 'dispose' of them immediately
That was 10 calories I was not about to have resting on my hips

I was so stressed by the time I finally made it home
I could barely go down on my boyfriend - he's the football captain *squeal* :)
I don't remember ever being that upset!
Oh well, the profloft is kicking in now

I have some nerds to IM
I can't let my 'A's fail me now!
I know what you're thinking:
If I don't do the work, how can I pass the tests,
Right?
Here's the thing, I don't have to worry
I tell my teachers that my homework proves my intelligence
There's no need to waste either of our time with the silly tests
Of course I tell them all of this while we're in bed together
But that's totally irrelevant!
Anyway, my other boyfriend- he's basketball captain *squeal* :)
Well, he's on his way over

Kiss, Kiss!

Submitted on 2005-01-22 18:50:48 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  I really like this poem. Anybody can read it and understand it because obviously those kind of people exist everywhere. It's disgusting but it's true and i love how it just a satirical approach towards the matter.
| Posted on 2006-02-15 00:00:00 | by BigRed | [ Reply to This ]
  This was so good! I dont think i can compliment u anymore than anyone else has but i just wanted you to know i really liked it and im adding it to my favorties
| Posted on 2006-02-15 00:00:00 | by jen531 | [ Reply to This ]
  This is great I love giving the upper caste a kick in the pants and you pulled it off magnificently. Right away with the “oh my gawd” I knew the was going to be funny. the shallowness of worrying about butt size I mean totally big booties are in anywayz hehe shoelaces to sandals my gosh. Keys to the Porsche.. Capital “P” for that. The rest here looks tubular.

Next stanza or um paragraph. side note: I would reclassify this as spoof comedy but that would be just me. Second line here you have “remeber" you want “remember” the forgetting the pencil that was in the person’s hand that is way cool. I forget a lot too but hell sometimes it is funny as well. Then it goes on here about wearing just pink and not baby pink that is off the hook haha umm I am so going to leave like the misspelled word “Humilitated” because it does sound so much like popular girl speak like for sure and could very well be purposeful, so no biggie on that. ok so like I am so going to like continue now m-kay?

hahaha eating two tacs and feeling like a heffer that is priceless jeezus haha o righty what else is here? the binge and purge for two tic tacs that is sweet!

all the “I” words normally would vex me in a write but here it seems like a must, matter of fact the more “I” words the better, since “I” revolves around that whole lifestyle.

moving on with the boyfriend being the football captain, what a friggin shock! I didn’t see that one coming haha well done I love it. Having nerd liaisons to help with homework is great and sleeping with teachers is wonderful anything for the grade, I say. that will prove to be attributes indispensable that will most certainly help in the working world, especially in the private sector hahaha great piece! wonderful humor, let me know what you decide about those couple of corrections, this is one of the best I have read from you. I wish for you to do more comedies because I think you have a wicked talent,

Way cool!

~mike
| Posted on 2006-01-26 00:00:00 | by inspirit999 | [ Reply to This ]
  LMAO...I so went to high school with girls like this and I soooo miss the drama that they created everywhere they went. I forgot just how entertaining this could be-annoying, but also very entertaining. Nice write, it gave me a good laugh all the way down memory lane!

Candi
| Posted on 2006-03-06 00:00:00 | by dreamweaver | [ Reply to This ]
  hehe I loved this! Having been taunted by "preppy" people since starting at my current school I have developed a distaste for them that borders on hatred and thus find anything that mocks them most hilarious. I loved the way it showed their bad side (which really isn't that hard to do) and mocked their silly little ways.
| Posted on 2005-12-29 00:00:00 | by Cat | [ Reply to This ]
  haha so awesome, I got sooooooo into it. The story just kept getting better and better... Yeah, I love how you wrote this, It was perfect, It was like a Cheerleaders Journal or something, how they write in em everyday n what not... yeah well I'm gonna add this one, I like it a lot...peace
| Posted on 2005-12-24 00:00:00 | by vanhokinshtyl | [ Reply to This ]
  oh ma gawd,
this was like sooooooooo kool, lol
i really liked this, really funny and so true
def adding to ma faves.
thanx for sharing
x x x x
| Posted on 2005-12-12 00:00:00 | by secret kisses | [ Reply to This ]
  How can I possibly compliment you on this poem anymore than everyone else has? ... I just HAD to tell you how awesome this is anyway.

it's truly a great work. favorited*

| Posted on 2005-12-08 00:00:00 | by mrmundane | [ Reply to This ]
  Courtney- my little dear i love this freakin poem! it rocks and could so explain our school... like OH MY GAWD you totally rock! this is so totally fab u lous! fabulous my darling just FAB U LASS! it is really great...
| Posted on 2005-12-02 00:00:00 | by time2leave | [ Reply to This ]
  Haha! Thats hilarious...sounds like some of the girls at my school...I hate those kinda people...I am going to have to add that to my favorites! Oh yeah...thanks for the laugh!

Nichole
| Posted on 2005-07-03 00:00:00 | by fallenpopcorn10 | [ Reply to This ]
  Wow i am with the last person... She's a F*ck. seriously. Actually it was kinda depressing if you ask me. :3 Little whore. Kinda creepy eh? I mean dood. TWO boyfriends, TWO.
o.o Can't you ever be satisfied with one? Shit. That's just inconsiderate. *this comment was not said by me but, Mieko. but kyle thinks that this write was good and yes really really random. just like you write, random. it's awesome so thank you for the randomness of my day. THNX

- Nammy
| Posted on 2005-05-11 00:00:00 | by Namlooc20 | [ Reply to This ]
  Ahhahahahahaha ...I'm sorry ...I hate her !...as the poem went on ...i was getting more and more annoyed ...then i just starting laughing ...so YaY !...I have a friend like this ...I hate her too ...I hate everyone ...But i love this pome...cracked me up and made me day ...Blessed Be
| Posted on 2005-04-26 00:00:00 | by Krysti | [ Reply to This ]
  I like that you were making fun of the preps because I know what they're like. I almost became one and then I realized that's not who I am. I never wanted to be obbsessed with my looks or shopping or really how many guys I can get in bed with. Luckily I'm one of those kind of girls who thinks better of herself before she does things like that. I never seen the point in giving myself a bad name like some of the preps do. I would talk to them on occassion but I never really hung out with them. I liked the friends that I already had at the time. Now I don't hang out with any of the people I graduated with. I hang out with the ones who knew me and didn't care about trying to be all that or about getting hooked on having six different boyfriends. Keep up the great work. This was hilarious.
| Posted on 2005-02-08 00:00:00 | by manda_bear | [ Reply to This ]
  I was going to take the "total" preppy approach to commenting on this one but I found it anticlimactic, since you did a very good job describing a day in the life of my cheerleader cousin, and yes, she is the Head Cheerleader.

To think I had a close relationship with this thing, I uh mean person...No worries, my cousin Jamie soon fell in step after Stephannie and we have another Head Cheerleader...and their parents couldn't be happier.

I remember sitting in the mud with these girls, now one look at a worm and they freak out, how sad...This was very much enjoyable, even if it did bring back the memories of our family reunion *cringe*. See yaz!
| Posted on 2005-01-28 00:00:00 | by Krazy | [ Reply to This ]
  Courtney... this is the funniest and the saddest thing ive ever read. Peyton this is NOT happy... least the last time i checked bulimia wasnt copasetic.also... ummm oral sex... not cool. Anyways courtney... aside from the depressing nature of this 'happy' poem i like it. i disagree with putting it in the portfolio... if doesnt have a general relevance. W/e. love ya girl... i like ur twisted humor... it makes me giggle (all the while i was licking the utters).
| Posted on 2005-01-23 00:00:00 | by BuryThisLie | [ Reply to This ]
  nice way to talk of the other type of people in your school. my question is this, have you ever put yourself in their shoes?? do you know what they go through on a daily basis that makes them this way? just because their status may be above others doesn't make them any less human. in fact, "popular" kids face more problems at home than others. "popular" kids typically go on to have greater drug and alcohol addictions. i think this is a great write, i just suggest you step in their shoes before making a mockery of them.
| Posted on 2005-01-23 00:00:00 | by _winky_ | [ Reply to This ]
  hey courtney.. who was the first line influenced by... hopefully it wasn't me cause I don't think I'm that bad... am I... this was pretty cool.. It made me think of a few people that I know... it was really written in "there" sense as if you were a preppy person at one time in your life... ha that's hilarious... you should write one about sad little wannabe goth girls that listen to good charlotte or simple plan.. I think that wuld be so suiting... ha maybe I'll wrtie something about them... don't think of writting one that's my idea.. damn namit.
| Posted on 2005-01-23 00:00:00 | by bleedbroken | [ Reply to This ]
  That's hilarious. Gave me a good laugh. I have "preppy" friends, but they laugh at themselves, and they are not nearly that bad anyway. Nice job.
| Posted on 2005-01-22 00:00:00 | by AngelOutlaw | [ Reply to This ]
  Oh my Gawd! I mean that was so totally fabulous! lol. Great write dear. You have completely told the story of the [censored]es. This is great; I don't know what to else to say. Wonderful job.

Rain
| Posted on 2005-01-22 00:00:00 | by Rain | [ Reply to This ]
  Thank you soo much for lightening up my day with this one. I was bored at work and ran upon this write...Oh my gawd!I had to laugh out loud. I am going to print this out and whenever I have abad day I will read it..Hope you don't mind. i am going to tell those co-workers who are interested to look u up girrrrrl.
Thanks again I laughed my azz off!
| Posted on 2005-02-25 00:00:00 | by smalltown | [ Reply to This ]
  Tres amusing. It makes those of us with but one boyfriend feel much better about ourselves. ^_^

~Birdie~
| Posted on 2006-04-20 00:00:00 | by MaeBirdie | [ Reply to This ]

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