Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Butcher's Paperdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Brwnsknsam05
    ASL Info:    32/F/ Cuba
    Elite Ratio:    4.78 - 399/440/103
    Words: 179
    Class/Type: Poetry/Venting
    Total Views: 1209
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1369



    Description:
       A butcher's paper is known in England as a paper which lists things that you believe are ideal...so that's what I wrote about in poem form. My ideal world.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsButcher's Paperdots
    -------------------------------------------


    My ideal world...
    Opens up, it yearns
    Awake. And unfearful
    Smiling in a peach flavored
    Cringe...beauty

    It has no jerks
    No broken hearts
    No sorrow or sadness
    Simplicity.
    The epitome of perfection

    Jump roping and hopscotching
    Playing hide and seek
    Shaping all things, beautiful
    Searching for the stability
    in the eyes of a child

    Expressing emotions
    With hugs and kisses
    Iceberg finger tips
    Filled with desire
    Printing the price of love
    On fallen leaves

    Reds and oranges
    Setting into a smile
    A spherical character
    Rising with yawning impatience
    A waking sun

    My ideal world...
    Filled with fools
    Foolish pettiness
    And shy tenderness
    Happiness in the eyes of the abnormal

    Normalcy is an over-rated word
    The normal are the minority
    The foolish, the independent party
    The different are left...the majority
    My ideal world...

    One foolish thought
    With fools full of hope
    And it's all right
    Because right is no longer abstract
    And wrong is for the lonely

    My ideal world...
    Full of broken promises





    Submitted on 2005-01-25 12:29:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      jeeez hun,

    broken promises?...who done it?! I'll get 'em! let me at 'em! for me, i'd rather have the abnormal people...first of all...i'm abnormal...which is cool, i talk to everyone, everyday, and tell them good morning, and what the society thinks is normal, is such crap, what do you think? It just seems that way to me. I'll agree with Dana...only love my dear...lol...only love. But i think as well that love is hard to come by...real love...don't you think...but that is the perfect world when you find it. thats what i think. Anyway, i'm mumbling now...take care...

    love
    brent
    | Posted on 2005-01-27 00:00:00 | by austin | [ Reply to This ]
      As a longtime fool (or freak as my circle of friends refer to each other), I love the idea of a world where fools rule and "normalcy" is the minority (though that would make foolish normal and normal abnormal, right? k. you're right. that's not the point).

    I like your world. Well crafted, full of color, vital, vibrant...what's not to like?

    (one minor issue...I think you have a typo in S4 L3 with iceberf)

    Nice work
    | Posted on 2005-01-25 00:00:00 | by deadndreaming | [ Reply to This ]
      Well, I guess that's the way a perfect world would truly look, but remember that without knowing sorrow and lies, we would never know what is happiness and truth...but the other thing is very true, love rule the world, and certainly only love can make this world to be ideal..:)
    The ending is impressive:
    My ideal world...
    Full of broken promises

    Thank you, it was pleasant to read it!

    | Posted on 2005-01-25 00:00:00 | by Dana | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    43733

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Stance written by Daniel Barlow
    Still written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Legends written by poetotoe
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Chasing The Lie written by jackz
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Bam (Awash). written by Daniel Barlow
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Some of it written by Daniel Barlow
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    less is more written by Daniel Barlow
    Instances written by hyproglo
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Where is My Ghost written by ForgottenGraves
    Limbo written by HisNameIsNoMore
    All Time Low written by Janesaddiction
    This written by Chelebel
    Everyone written by poetotoe
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    Broken Promises written by S.A.M.
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry