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Halo and Horns


Author: Rubi_Roja
ASL Info:    20/F/
Elite Ratio:    3.8 - 185 /164 /29
Words: 122
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 974
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 680



Description:


What are you looking for in terms of feedback? Any background information behind the piece? Hints? Is this just to vent? Emotional state while writing?


Halo and Horns



I wish you could handle the true me,
my two faces, two sides you could really see,
do you remember when I told you I was dying?
well, inside I was laughing because I was lying,
I tricked you, I picked you first,
your good soul I did thirst,
I made you drink the chalice filled to the brim with malice,
How guilty did that make you feel?
But you did it for me and at least that was real,
your blind to the fire that follows my feet around,
and I'll kick you harder as you squirm on the ground,
but when your thought of my love start to waver,
I'll put on a halo and become your Saviour




Submitted on 2005-01-25 23:57:55     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  Good read. It was a little jumbled in my head. i liked it, it said a lot. i suppose your genre is dark. You pull it off well.
| Posted on 2005-04-20 00:00:00 | by Malcolm Bishop | [ Reply to This ]
  wow, you sound like a freakin psycho! just kidding. that is awesome. powerful. blunt but full full full of imagery. just housekeeping stuff here...line 10...change "your" to "you're"...line 12...put an "s" and the end of "start"...i enjoyed this piece intensely.
| Posted on 2005-03-17 00:00:00 | by treybur | [ Reply to This ]
  holy shizzzzzzzzznit... i am totaly frightened of you now.. but i am probly gonna read another poem...and if i keep liking your stuff i might put you on stalk... cuz its alot better to stalk a good poet then take a chance and end up reading another crappy teenager poem (egads i hate crappy teenager poems). take care and keep writin.
| Posted on 2005-02-14 00:00:00 | by snacky fish | [ Reply to This ]
  This was down right kool with your contrasting personalities, I love the flow and the mocking voice i hear in this poem. Though if I was your b/f I might sleep with one eye open,lol
| Posted on 2005-02-03 00:00:00 | by edthepoet | [ Reply to This ]
  It's nice to see the honesty inherent in a poem that says "I keep hurting you", but doesn't say "I'm sorry, I don't know why I do this"... instead it says "I'm not particularly sorry, this is what I do, and I love it... and you're going nowhere". Very honest... but I couldn't date you...

for more than a year or so...

two years tops...

seven years of marriage... but then we're done... seriously.
| Posted on 2005-01-27 00:00:00 | by jer | [ Reply to This ]
  woah...i guess it isnt dark its just an awefully true thing to say. sometimes you jsut dont love the person, but when it comes to proving that you are worthy of loving, you throw down the gauntlet and step into the ring and say "YEAH KILL ME, BUT I WILL NOT DIE! the spirit is untouchable..." good job soldier
| Posted on 2005-03-03 00:00:00 | by serpentarius | [ Reply to This ]
  Haha, nice! This reminds me alot of earlier Garbage tunes, with plenty of attitude and (not so) subtle power games and psychological S&M. I also like alot the insisting rhyme scheme, it contributes alot to the general feeling of the poem: like it's just a game to you to crush them.
| Posted on 2005-02-02 00:00:00 | by the apocrypha | [ Reply to This ]


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