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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: love is a shape-shifterdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jinx
    ASL Info:    16/F/Canada
    Elite Ratio:    4.37 - 44/58/26
    Words: 102
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 355
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 715



    Description:
       I'm frighteningly in crush(and in pain) at the moment, so this poem probably sucks and i can't tell. it would be awsome if someone could give me a little feedback so i can bring this up to read-out-loud-able quality. any and all feedback is appreciated.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotslove is a shape-shifterdots
    -------------------------------------------


    When you are a little girl,
    love is a sunflower.
    It grows, it flourishes
    smiling and
    mocking the absurdity
    of your immature preconceptions.
    As you change, it changes with you.
    it becomes your prom dress;
    showy and flamboyant.
    wanting it isnt as important as having it,
    you just have to be the one
    with the best one.
    Once you understand it
    it will understand you,
    and your weak points.
    It's a long, dull, sarated blade
    that hacks bits and pieces
    off of every superficial perfection you meet,
    until you can see a trail
    of romance's empty carcasses
    strewn behind it.




    Submitted on 2005-02-16 21:54:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Blew me away at the start, the first and second thoughts i agree with: When you are a little girl,
    love is a sunflower. and : As you change, it changes with you.
    it becomes your prom dress. I like that. Twords the end, it got a little pessimistic, and it may be because you are going through a tough time, but not all love is bad, you're only 14, give it time. I must say though, for a 14 year old you have some enlightening views on life. Kepp it up. :)
    | Posted on 2005-02-16 00:00:00 | by lost_escape | [ Reply to This ]
      Real good, although I was'nt a little girl, but I got your point and state of view. Good thinking on life for a 15 year old.Open minded I see. Well, keep up the good writing.
    | Posted on 2005-02-20 00:00:00 | by jermwerm | [ Reply to This ]



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