Please Take it All Away -------------------------------------------
Memories floating in front of me
Naked, white and free
They remind me, and make me see
What I could not be
There is a cloud up there
Cutting across the air
There is hope where
Time does not stay.
And I can’t take any more
Leave me in the dark
You enjoy this I’m sure
But please take it all away…
They say that love is great
But I say that it’s fate
Sometimes it’s all in vain
Cause you can’t escape
Sometimes on a cold night
Devoid of light
You can see someone who’s crying
And that someone is me!
And I can’t take anymore
Leave me in the dark
You enjoy this I’m sure
But please take it all away…
It’s my fault
All mine
I never did see
How special you were
But now you aren’t here
And now…
Please take it all away…
(Mute)
And I can’t take anymore
Leave me in the dark
You enjoy this I’m sure
But please take it all away…
Good write. I liked it a lot. It expressed good emotion, and they were very good lyrics. The structure was well displayed, and you could tell that you're writing out of your own style. The theme wasn't exactly different, but you made it your own, Very nicely done. I applaud you :-)
Hey friend! I've had a little break and now I'm back - though I still CAN'T WRITE ANYTHING - and I'm pretty worried about it, anyway, let's get to this one - cause it seems very nice.
Concerning the style - it's all ok for me, as for lyrics of course. Every sentence has got a kind of melody, and the chorus is done very well too. A fine construction. The idea with 'mute' is very interesting and gives it melodicism again.
Concerning interpretation, I am not sure about the part:
'Leave me in the dark'
and then:
'But please take it all away'
On one hand if I take as a kind of freedom from memories (darkness) it works well, on the other - it just doesn't fit. Could be written differently. Now, I think it's a very special kinda-love-song, it really is. And I enjoyed it very, very much. And I'm gonna give you a big five if it is possible, cause you absolutely deserve it. It's been a long time since I was here last time - and I think you keep instantly developing yourself. And it's great!
By the way, those guys on the photo, god, they're horny. ;)
These sound kind of angry, and to be honest, I've kind of gone away from angry music and lyrics. So I don't really know what to comment on because of that and that lack of inspiration I've been having recently.
I'll give you this much though, these are best lyrics I have read on this site for a long while because the "lyrics" section has just been poetry with no obvious melody or rhythm behind any of them. Well even though I can't really comment on this, I'll compare it to your others and say that your lyrical talent keeps on getting better and better. Great job!
Submission Name: Please Take it All Away
