Description: For those of you that have read my stuff before, it was usually about someone. Well that someone has changed. And maybe for the better. I know it may not be a good thing to go after an ex, but I still love her, and believe that I always will. I had to go past my ego and pride to write this, so I hope you all understand; I can't be trusted with my own heart.
All This Time -------------------------------------------
I stick my closed hand out;
it gets burned by fire.
I pull my hand back in;
it gets frozen by ice.
I lift my hand to the sky;
it gets struck by lightning.
I place my hand underground;
but I reel it back when I feel teeth.
When you walk over to look at my commotion
and begin to open my hand
You see my tattered heart
from all the things I put it through.
You say it didn't look like this
the moment you stole it away from me.
You can't believe that I'd do this to myself
and we stare off for a while.
As you turn and hold out your hands
I wince, but recognize loving hands
and comfortably place it where it should have been
All this time.
I like the imagery, and the story. Perhaps the ending could be stated in metaphor, like in the first part of the poem, using imagery of soothing, healing, comfort, etc?
Wow so much emotion. Lots of imagery. What I like most about poems is the imagery. Its nice to know how the writer is feeling, a picture really does help..
I stick my closed hand out; it gets burned by fire. I pull my hand back in; it gets frozen by ice. I lift my hand to the sky; it gets struck by lightning.
Your words here were powerful. I'm sorry about the situation. But everything turns out for the best.. Doesn't it..? I suppose. I am sure you will feel better in no time. But it'll take sometime.
Hmmm. . .I guess then everything turned out to your advantage. Hope you work out with it. There is a lot of emotion behind this. Never thought of a metaphor like that before, I have to say it's definitely new and exciting.
Submission Name: All This Time
