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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Of Apathy and Zealdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Lightbringer
    ASL Info:    25/M/under your couch
    Elite Ratio:    4.63 - 188/210/36
    Words: 288
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 324
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1874



    Description:
       I've been working on this piece for a while. Let me know what needs fixing. Any and all comments are appreciated and taken seriously. Structure wise I really really haven't thought about it. I just structured it as I wrote it. Any ideas on this aspect will be appreciated. Thanks.
    -Light


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsOf Apathy and Zealdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Sleep demons hanging from eyelashes
    As the dragon under the desk snores
    And scratches a gold coin
    Out from between titanium scales

    Swimming images flashing
    Across a groggy mind
    As jesters juggle and tumble
    Across the floor

    A pen falls near the waste basket
    Filled to exploding with numbers and doodles
    The constant drip of the water cooler
    Adds a heartbeat
    To the monotony of the daily grind

    Hand shakes and knifings (in the back of course)
    Doled out like ear tags at a county fair
    One of each for everyone
    Two for the piggies with brown smudged snouts

    Scrounging every last penny
    Until they squeak when they walk
    Life size wind up soldiers with no real purpose
    But to entertain their creator

    Just cattle, lined up at the trough,
    Waiting for a drink
    “Grande vanilla cap, dry please”
    The recitation becomes automatic
    After a while

    Often times it seems
    That the humming and drumming
    Of everyday life
    Drowns out the sense of self
    Planted inside the souls of man
    By the multifaceted faces of their
    Creators (or Creator)

    These gods (or God)
    Seem(s) to act like a child
    With an ant farm
    Or maybe the human psyche
    Is too simple to comprehend the plans
    Of an entity far more “advanced” than itself.

    Zealous individuals misquoting
    10 font pages in Times New Roman
    Proclaiming that man
    Is second only to one.
    Ignoring the facts
    Flashing in front of their eyes,
    Refusing to believe that man
    Is a puppet,
    A puppet,
    Cursed with free will
    And no real freedom.




    Submitted on 2005-02-27 21:15:35     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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