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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Am I A Ghost?dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: stefanie mae
    ASL Info:    18/F/MA
    Elite Ratio:    4.59 - 37/50/20
    Words: 114
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 278
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 636



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAm I A Ghost?dots
    -------------------------------------------


    when you're with her-
    i feel like a ghost.

    like i can stand in front of you
    and wave my hands
    up
    and
    down
    and all you see is a shadow-
    a shadow that means nothing and feels
    nothing
    and therefore is not at all worth talking with.

    but sometimes the shadow is the one
    you have to go to.
    it is the only thing that shades your face
    and hides you for no one else to see.

    they teach you
    to live
    and to lie
    and to tough it up.

    and then the sun comes out.




    Submitted on 2005-03-09 16:09:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      I like this poem.. It seems that everyone goes through it.. Many times or just one time.. But I feel the same way.. You try everything.. You think, maybe he doesn't see you.. Its a very complicated world.. I like this one guy.. Huge crush on him.. The day I was gonna ask him out, he asked out another girl. I was broke in too. It feels like the world is coming to an end.. I mean I was broken..

    I think this poem can use stronger words.. I think this write can become a really powerful write.. It has potential to do good. I just think you got to play with words..

    Much love to ya hun
    stephanie
    | Posted on 2005-03-09 00:00:00 | by XxStephyxX04 | [ Reply to This ]
      I bet maybe when i read this poem i'm on some whole different level than what you were thinking about. WHen i read this, though, i think about a girl having this male friend in her life that she wants to hold closer than you hold someone who's just a friend, you know? This guy, though, he's got his own relationshiop going and when he's with his woman, the girl, his friend, becomes less significant. But perhaps it's only her that seems less important to him when he's with her. Maybe it's just him giving his lady the kind of attention a man supposed to give his girl and she just feels like a ghost because she wants to be her this girlfriends shoes. THe third stanza makes it seem like the girls friendship with the man is very deep and open and honest and that she's emotionaly there for him because of this bright burning candle she carries for him.

    I like the stanza "they teach you to live/and lie/and to tough it up" It echoes the stereotypical image of what a man should be that is force feed down the throats of young men, depriving them of the opprotunity to learn the beauty and naturalness of being open with all emotions, including the not-so-pretty ones. But like, this guy, he's open like that when it's just her and him together. I'd bet that this "ghost" owns a more significant piece of this mans heart than this other woman ever could. That's how it was with me. But perhaps more on that later.

    Bottoms up
    Spoken
    | Posted on 2005-03-09 00:00:00 | by spoken | [ Reply to This ]



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