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    dots Submission Name: deceptiondots

    Author: Krinchinian
    ASL Info:    20/f/pa
    Elite Ratio:    3.12 - 164/231/84
    Words: 163
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 788
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 956

       I wrote this poem about a guy that i liked that claimed to like me back....but then he asked another girl out

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    What i can't seem to understand
    Is if you never like me
    Why did you hold my hand?
    You had me hanging on a hope
    That we could one day learn to cope
    That one day you would realize
    The look i get in my eyes
    Is because i think i love you
    If only you would understand
    Like leaving footprints in the sand
    You left imprints on my heart
    I knew right from the start
    That when you walked into my life
    I wanted to be your wife
    Why can't you just see
    That we were meant to be
    You wont even give me a chance
    I wanna share my last dance
    With you and only you
    This is to good to be true
    I'm living in a dream
    Nothing is as it seams
    I'm afraid of waking up
    And everything will disapear
    Nothing in my life is sincere
    I wanna run away from here
    Run away from my feelings

    Submitted on 2005-03-14 15:09:40     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Hi, I've just read your three love poems, and the first thing I have to say is I'm very impressed that at fourteen you not only have such adult thoughts, but are capable of expressing them so well in verse! Maybe us oldies just don't realize how things work these days...
    You use a nice image in:
    Like leaving footprints in the sand
    You left imprints on my heart
    that's nice, and unique, you need that in a poem about love, cos there has been quadrazillions of love poems written, and they get very samey.
    This one is good, I love the staccato style of the rhyme, as though your thoughts are tumbling out bubbling over each other. Very, very good. By the way, I'm sure things'll work out (they always do), bye for now, and be happy, Graeme
    | Posted on 2005-03-22 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]
      Thats a bummer about the guy. Some people just cant accept or appreciate it when someone really loves them. And you did a good job of expressing your thoughts...and feelings. Its easy to run...harder to stand and accept the truths. I hope all works out for you.
    | Posted on 2005-03-15 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]

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