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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: To Longdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: theman
    ASL Info:    21/m/mn
    Elite Ratio:    3.52 - 496/478/149
    Words: 142
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 709
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 884



    Description:
       rough draft
    please comment.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTo Longdots
    -------------------------------------------


    It's been to long
    I need to see you
    I can't sleep
    3:00 O'clock in the morning
    I'm still thinking of you.
    I'm so weak with out your touch.

    It's been to long
    I need to see you
    For you are my diamond

    It's been to long
    I need to see you
    How could they doubt you?
    Never think about you
    Donít they know nothing is possible without you?

    It's been to long
    I need to see you
    I wonder how I make it this far
    Because of you
    Iím me
    So you're the real star

    It's been to long
    I need to see you
    I shred blood for you, I would die for you
    I need to see you

    It's been to long
    I need to see you
    Because I love you.




    Submitted on 2005-03-18 15:09:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I don't know what i think of it i can seewhere your coming from, but i still don't understand. You need to work on your grammer and spelling.
    | Posted on 2005-03-21 00:00:00 | by sheltie | [ Reply to This ]
      its pretty good...i wouldn't repeat "its been to long i need to see you" so many times...but other than that it has a good flow and i really know where your coming from on this one...im going through it right now...i finally met a guy i think i can love...and he moved away to new york...we still talk every night...but i need to see his face...hearing his voice...isn't filling my need of love to be with him...were gonna meet up again...someday...i hope you can do the same
    | Posted on 2005-03-19 00:00:00 | by Krinchinian | [ Reply to This ]
      Kool, a little rough around the edges, double check your spelling, but over all, i liked it, i could almost feel your pain. I to am going through a seperation. it hurts. take care and keep writing, would like to read more.
    deb
    aka> illusions35904
    | Posted on 2005-03-18 00:00:00 | by illusions35904 | [ Reply to This ]


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