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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Bullydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Maskannai
    ASL Info:    28/Female/Utah
    Elite Ratio:    4.94 - 214/184/78
    Words: 108
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 793
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 691



    Description:
       This was another of those experiments that my friend and I did a couple of weeks ago..


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Bullydots
    -------------------------------------------


    I woke that morning
    a feeling of dread in my heart
    knowing that he was waiting for me;

    I walked to school
    carrying my book bag
    close to my thudding heart,
    not knowing around which corner
    he would be hiding;

    Classes came and went
    and he had yet not appeared,
    but I knew I couldn't
    let my guard down for one second,
    or he would pounce;

    I hate these chains
    I am forced to live in
    every day that I breathe;

    Please, tell him to leave me alone
    so I can sleep without
    hearing myself whimper
    from the fear he has instilled in me.




    Submitted on 2005-03-24 16:48:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Hey Maskannai

    Nice poem ;0) I have read it couple of times and liked the idea and the flow in your poem ;0) I would only suggest one thing that maybe could improve the flow :

    I woke that morning
    Felt, dread in my heart
    knowing that he was waiting for me;

    I especially liked

    close to my thudding heart,
    not knowing around which corner
    he would be hiding;

    Keep writing ;0)
    | Posted on 2005-03-24 00:00:00 | by KNS | [ Reply to This ]
      Aw snap - dats the brandy. Okay so its about a bully. Bullies r not stalkers (normally). Just the same its a good piece. I think all children must be taught to strike back. Once I knew to strike back, bullies ceased to exist. Then again, that would make for a lotta kid violence. But if u can't fight as a kid when can ya huh?
    shard
    | Posted on 2005-03-25 00:00:00 | by particularshard | [ Reply to This ]
      So I'ma assume this is about a stalker? Its a crazy situation. I've never understood why guys (or girls) do that. If they r truly as in love as they claim, y would they want to inflict that sort of pain? I don't know about it, but its a good poem.
    shard
    | Posted on 2005-03-25 00:00:00 | by particularshard | [ Reply to This ]


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