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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Once Againdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: theman
    ASL Info:    21/m/mn
    Elite Ratio:    3.52 - 496/478/149
    Words: 385
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 616
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2433



    Description:
       Please comment And tell me how you feal about it.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsOnce Againdots
    -------------------------------------------


    The blade of this knife can end my life tonight.
    I clinch my fist and let the blood run down to my fist
    So when I cut my wrist the blood is still blue when hits the ground.
    I let the knife go into my wrist without a flinch.
    The blood is still blue because I slice my wrist so fast.
    Once again this knife releases my pain
    Once again this knife is my friend.
    Once again I'm hiding in the bath tub
    Letting the blood run from my wrist into the drain.
    Once again I'm waiting to die.

    I take knife to my chest
    Because the slices on my wrist motivate me to do more.
    I take the knife to my chest.
    Carving a cross
    Because every one tossed me to the side
    Once again I'm crying
    Once again my emotions are switching around
    Hate, love, confused, abandonment, suicidal, homicidal.
    Once again this knife releases my pain
    Once again this knife is my friend.
    Once again I'm hiding in the bath tub
    Letting the blood run from my wrist into the drain.
    Once again I'm waiting to die

    I past out
    Waking up in the hospital
    Now I know some really cares
    There giving me blood
    My parents are saying "how could you do this again?"
    Once again I'm explaining
    Once again my mother is fainting
    Once again my father is crying
    Once again I'm stuck in the Psyche ward.
    Once again I'm crying
    Once again my emotions are switching around
    Hate, love, confused, abandonment, suicidal, homicidal.
    Once again that knife released my pain
    Once again this knife was a friend.
    Once again I was in the bath tub
    Letting the blood run from my wrist into the drain.
    Once again I was waiting to die.
    Once again today wasn't my day to die.

    Now they diagnose me
    Mood disorder, manic bipolar, abandonment disorder, they say I have a mind of a criminal.
    Thay put me on meds and they lock me up and tell me to shut the fuck up.
    Once again I'm locked up
    Once again i'm waiting to go home
    Once again I'm sorry.
    Once again my emotions are switching around
    Hate, love, confused, abandonment, suicidal, homicidal.
    Once again having to wait for forgivness




    Submitted on 2005-03-25 23:25:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      that is an awesome poem it is longer yay, and it show the true feelings, and when you are repeating yourself it sounds good and it goes with the flow of the poem.
    ~liz~
    | Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by Fadingperson | [ Reply to This ]
      WOW I really got caught up in this piece. Man, I loved the way you kepted going after most people would end it. You took it all the way to where they diagnose you. When I read this I got so caught up in I didn't even here my neighbor knock on the door. lol [seriously]
    I really like it, it was awsome.
    | Posted on 2005-05-01 00:00:00 | by Coffee Brake | [ Reply to This ]
      i dont actually like this... it had a good story but it doesnt seem original and doesnt seem to connect or have any flow to it... try again
    | Posted on 2005-04-01 00:00:00 | by dark-red-pain | [ Reply to This ]
      This is another excellent write, the first part contians the same actions as in the way to kill yourself, but then it keeps going on the product of this.. also I like that this time you expressed your emotions, a lot of this is how confused and depressed you are.. another good thing is that you wrote this poem so well that meanwhile you described all this I can imagine this situations all in my head.. and that is a good thing because some poems you read them and they don't have such a great impact on you because you couldn't imagine it.. but this one you can or atleast I could. I love the way you keep repeating your emotions it adds so much more intensity to the poem... you also added rhyme that didn't sound forced.. because some poems get the flow interrupted because the rhyming is very forced. meh I never believe much in what doctors say, I mean yeah if you have a pain somewhere yes because the x-ray shows it, but when it comes to the state of mind of someone I doubt you can really judge that and point out exactly what is wrong with them... I mean why can't it just be that someone is having a really hard time? but no they have to say that they are bipolar and have mood disorders and things like that... anyway I hope you feel better and this was yet another excellent piece...^-^
    | Posted on 2005-03-27 00:00:00 | by nj | [ Reply to This ]


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