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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Beauty Redefineddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: greensnake
    ASL Info:    60/female/ N.C.
    Elite Ratio:    4.17 - 770/691/75
    Words: 72
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1261
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 509



    Description:
       A compilation of several women that I know. All of whom are beautiful even though not tall, flat chested and blonde. May the world acknowledge their beauty and the beauty in each of us.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBeauty Redefineddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Her hair is so soft
    Curling tightly on her scalp -
    No pretense for her

    Full lips and broad nose
    Will never know changes
    At the surgeon's hand.

    Her short and round body
    Glides across the world's byways
    Without show of stress.

    From her ears and neck
    Gold falls in yellow cascades
    To hilite dark skin.

    Golden eyes watching
    The world's reaction
    To her head held high.




    Submitted on 2005-03-26 18:48:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      First let me say bravo for the original concept and for seeing the true beauty of your friends as God meant them to be seen with.

    Lynn, you should be so proud of yourself with this poem, describing the many ways women are beautiful in their own unique way.
    | Posted on 2005-04-04 00:00:00 | by edthepoet | [ Reply to This ]
      I like what you've done here, Lynn. I think of beauty as inside/outside an all emcompassing portrait of a person, including how they act. You can believe that if they live a life of love they'll be beautiful, it just goes to enhance a beautiful countenance. Even people I've never seen from this site seem beautiful to me, because of the gentle ways in which they write. Thanks for typing up a glow for me, you're a peachy lady. Thanks for sharing, Lynn,
    peace and love,
    Nan
    | Posted on 2005-04-01 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
      beauty is mostly found on the inside, which is what I think you were trying to say and that everyone is beautiful in their own way. I too feel that you need more here. you described several people perhaps or compilations of a few people, but you did not really define beauty or what it means to you. you just listed. we need to see specifically what you were getting at, although we have a general idea. I think it's a good start.
    | Posted on 2005-03-31 00:00:00 | by sierramuse8 | [ Reply to This ]
      You can also count me as one of the people who are trying to inspire you to give a sharper focus on your picture of beauty. In this regard I don't claim to be impervious but it seems that as time goes on I see beauty not in terms of people's bodies, but what they do with them. Actually the infatuation with the temporary body is symptomatic of the soul's confusion. Sometimes I wonder how many poems I read on this site are influenced by someone dissappointed with the physical aspects of their body ...
    | Posted on 2005-03-30 00:00:00 | by kanu | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this a lot. I didn't like the flow so much, but I loved the idea. How you highlighted the unique beauty of each women, and how it was nothing like the world's idea of it. Something that every girl/women needs to remember. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder anyway.
    | Posted on 2005-03-27 00:00:00 | by AngelOutlaw | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the thought that you are trying to convey with this poem, but I have to agree with the other assesments...it seems like you have so much more you want to say, but maybe don't know how to say it. Often times when a person has something something so important to say they struggle for the words...maybe take another, more in depth look at your love for inspiration.
    | Posted on 2005-03-26 00:00:00 | by deepinthought | [ Reply to This ]
      i do agree somewhat that this poem felt like it held back a little. the thought of this poem is beautiful i work at a place where we accept the diffrences in people.. it is a clothing store called Torrid that caters to those who arent the so called "perfect body type" or the "norm" of society.. i am proud to be plus size and have my naturally curly hair... and i am glad that other people see beauty in diffrences wether that be a super skinny person.. someone with a big nose or whatever it may be.. there is beauty in us all and ir brings a smile to my face that someone has the balls to write about it!
    ~*~amber~*~
    | Posted on 2005-03-26 00:00:00 | by rocknpoetrychik | [ Reply to This ]
      I know the history behind this poem so therefore I read what it is saying Lynn. And I understand what the reviews mean about not being able to get a clear fix on this and so that means you take this gem of gestation to full term and bring it back redefined and polished and rich as the gold it testifys about and bless us all!
    | Posted on 2005-03-26 00:00:00 | by ladyngold | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem seems a bit lost to me. I get the feeling that you wanted to say so much more, but struggled against yourself. I like what you were trying to do. And I do get the visual, I just don't really care for the way it came together. Now please keep in mind, that my feeling on poetry is this, it is your child...a part of you, and so if you think it is your best, then dont let anyone convince you to change it. But if you know you could have done better, or pushed harder, then do it, because you would want to present your children at their best, to a waiting world. I look forward to reading more from you.
    | Posted on 2005-03-26 00:00:00 | by sistersinister | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree with sinstersinister, I think you could have done more with this poem. Although, I did enjoy the idea. I'm sure you'll better, and I hope to read more soon.
    | Posted on 2005-03-26 00:00:00 | by AngeloftheVoid | [ Reply to This ]
      what a confident girl! i love it. i could see this person in my mind's eye. it shows the power in liking yourself. great message
    | Posted on 2005-06-20 00:00:00 | by laniejane | [ Reply to This ]


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