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    dots Submission Name: Death is neardots

    Author: theman
    ASL Info:    21/m/mn
    Elite Ratio:    3.52 - 496/478/149
    Words: 122
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 666
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 754

       rough draft please comment.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDeath is neardots

    Death is near
    To the ones
    Who seeks it?
    Today isn't my day to die
    I'm breaking down and I'm crying
    The day I die
    My pain will be put aside
    These walls are inclosing on me
    I push and I push
    It doesn't matter
    The are still inclosing on me

    Death is near
    To the ones
    Who seeks it?
    Today isn't my day to die
    The wall is my barrier.
    It's inclosing on me
    I tried to push
    But Im too weak
    That knife has made me so weak.

    Death is near
    To the ones
    Who seeks it?
    I'm I the one who that seeks death
    Or Im just fantasizing about it.

    Submitted on 2005-03-28 15:40:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      the poem is short and dark and I love it, everyone feels like the walls are closing and that they can do nothing to stop it and i love how you ended make it seem that in the end the walls will close in but then asking if you are just day dreaming about it. good write!
    | Posted on 2005-05-10 00:00:00 | by Fadingperson | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the feel of this. It is going to happen why hide it. Death is never easy why suger coat it. By the way thanks for the comment on Love of my Life.
    | Posted on 2005-05-04 00:00:00 | by blackdawn | [ Reply to This ]
      hopefully no day is the day u should die! that was a harsh poem... in a way i can relate! i'm not too sure about the last line tho- mayb u sould fade your poem off more instead off using death twice as the last word in the last 2 lines. im confusng myself!
    | Posted on 2005-03-28 00:00:00 | by michaela | [ Reply to This ]

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