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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: HAPPY to see y'all Again!@!dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: JD_Heckle
    ASL Info:    19/THE Male/Briarwood
    Elite Ratio:    3.66 - 46/66/23
    Words: 131
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Happy
    Total Views: 277
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 778



    Description:
       just a couple of forced rhymes to all you!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHAPPY to see y'all Again!@!dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Why is it everytime you hear I'm around
    you're always gone never to be found
    I say fuck you, and I'll say it again
    you've always been an enemy instead of a friend
    you talk your shit and you just won't quit
    I'd put my fist in your mouth but it just won't fit
    I don't like you, and I probably never will
    hearing your thoughts make me feel very ill
    about to vomit all over you with a bad aftertaste
    you're like a sewer pond, just all full of waste
    may you smell like my bile forever in a day
    and everytime you take a shower
    may the water run away
    so fuck you there I said it once more
    FUCK YOU, you little shit eating butt sucking whore!




    Submitted on 2005-03-31 18:23:51     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      LMMFAO. [censored] the system of friends that claim to depend on you when the truth stands that you don't count and don't matter. its pissin horrible you can feel it in the bladder, you just wince at it, makes your face even madder. i'll rip [censored]es to tatters if the loose change fits, till then i'll squeeze **** and tell the world to suck my ****. talk is cheap, that why i called geiko.holla~nahlij
    | Posted on 2005-04-04 00:00:00 | by Aknahlij_d 1 | [ Reply to This ]
      well I found it interesting if others might not have sometimes it is absolutely necesary to have something like this in your arsenol, that is able to come out- I mean hell you coulkd go back and change all the curse words to BABY but it's still some butt sucking whore any way you look at it
    L A M E M A N S T E R M S
    | Posted on 2005-04-01 00:00:00 | by LameMansTerms | [ Reply to This ]
      well we are getting some anger out tonight I see, bravo I love emotion packed poems, ones that lash and through them all at me making me think that the poem is directly speeking toward me. I have to say that I ussually hate poems that are full of "bad" words, but I must say that They fit, and really put a bold mark on this poem.

    The poem seems to be more of a venting tool, so I am not sure what advice you are looking for, but basically you have the right emotion to capture the audiance, i would just expand on the idea and possibly with a little more delicate of a manor, through in some comparisions and some inagery, which you have started. just expand.

    Anyways hope life improves,
    much love
    kaity
    | Posted on 2005-03-31 00:00:00 | by Kaitylizzy | [ Reply to This ]



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