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Author: Deacon Elite Ratio:    3.53 - 19 /23 /9 Words: 61

Class/Type: Misc /Misc Total Views: 1270 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 317

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Looking out a 2 pane glass window frail veal of haze covers the mornings wake a shivered glance across the lake at the love I forsake standing wispy on dew sparkled blades of grass she whispers sweet nothings on passing breezes that stop to gasp only to turn to tell me of the beauty that I let slip my grasp.

Submitted on 2005-04-01 07:58:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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This is good. A short write but some of the best are. I would however, break the lines a bit.. such as: "Looking out a 2 pane glass window frail veal of haze covers the mornings wake a shivered glance across the lake at the love I forsake standing wispy on dew sparkled blades of grass she whispers sweet nothings on passing breezes that stop to gasp only to turn to tell me of the beauty that I let slip my grasp." Also change the 2 pane to two-pane? Just my thoughts. I like what it says and how you said it. It's good. Take Care! ~Sandra

| Posted on 2005-04-01 00:00:00 | by Intricate1 | [ Reply to This ]

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