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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Those Precarious Handlesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 96
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 606
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 660



    Description:
       No, I'm not being abused. I've seen a lot of abuse because I used to work in a battered women's shelter. However, I think everyone has been abused physically and/ or emotionally at some time. I used to get beaten up at school, and I've been verbally abused by my family.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThose Precarious Handlesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Washing our battered cups
    I think that every crack
    is one in my soul,
    and the coffee that accumulates
    around the damage
    is like your affection.
    You only hold me
    after you hurt me.
    You casually kiss my split lips
    and massage my purple blue arm.
    The vessel with the handle
    precariously attached
    makes me want to sever
    the ones you've attached
    to my heart,
    but I don't know
    if I'd survive the blood loss,
    and I know
    from looking at our table
    that you'd not even use
    a saucer to catch the spill.




    Submitted on 2005-04-03 07:22:34     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      I'm not going to tell you something new here but your beginning is great. especially the lines

    I think that every crack
    Is one in my soul

    you've presented a very popular (unfortuneatly) and lot written about topic in a very original and new way. very weel done, Amy.
    | Posted on 2005-04-06 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
      Washing our battered cups
    I think that every crack
    Is one in my soul

    What a wonderful way of putting it. The comparison is very apt and provokes thoughts.

    And the coffee that accumulates
    Around the damage
    Is like your affection
    You only hold me
    After you hurt me

    This is brilliant too. Really makes your point hit home. I get pictures of someone staring into a coffee cup after the event.

    You casually kiss my split lips
    And massage my purple blue arm
    The one with the handle
    Precariously attached

    I ponder over the handle bit...do you mean arm in a cast?

    Wonderful job again Amy :)
    Kate
    | Posted on 2005-04-06 00:00:00 | by elephantasia | [ Reply to This ]
      Love how you used the spilt coffee and broken utensils to describe abuse.
    My favorite lines :
    Makes me want to sever
    The ones you've attached
    To my heart
    But I don't know
    If I'd survive the blood loss

    That's why women stay on with the people who abuse them.

    p/s : This is my favorite picture of you so far!
    | Posted on 2005-04-05 00:00:00 | by Maverique | [ Reply to This ]
      Great use of the cup as metaphor to represent a battered spouse. You managed to show her denial too, that the beating is worth the cost, as then the affection comes. What a way to buy a ticket! But sadly said this the other side of abuse, takes two, to tango,
    thumping an old cliché. I understand this image well remembering my grandmother's old crazed and cracked coffee cups, with stains, but they never even raised their voices to one another. This was a difficult assignment and you do it justice..(wow, I think Freud just showed his slip!)
    Love and hugs,
    Nan
    | Posted on 2005-04-04 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
      Astute use of the roughed up cup as a symbol, to depict a violent relationship through transference rather than directly stating at the open, battered cups, stained.
    Then below you use the bruised arm as a meataphor for another part of the cup, or perhaps not, you weave in and out quite adroitly. But the points are made,
    and if anyone would bleed, it would be the one who chose to duel with you over words.
    | Posted on 2005-04-04 00:00:00 | by Sandburg | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a really good metaphor for an abused person (anybody). Nice portrayal here.

    [dumb computer says i need more words...]
    | Posted on 2005-04-03 00:00:00 | by joeyalphabet | [ Reply to This ]
      Washing our battered cups
    I think that every crack
    Is one in my soul
    And the coffee that accumulates
    Around the damage
    Is like your affection...

    what brutal opening lines. this is excellent, Amy. a unique metaphor, using the cracked coffee cup for an abusive relationship. this is brutal and painful, yet it needs to be said for people to understand that this happens way too often. it becomes a trap, and you acknowledge that toward the end by saying you might not survive the blood loss if you sever the ties you have with this person. excellent write. i know that you have experienced abuse in your life so you speak with experience, unfortunately. i am glad to know, however, that you are not in a physically abusive relationship.
    | Posted on 2005-04-03 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      This is really sad and hard to take in. Especially for someone like me, who has never been physically abused or really been affected by it. I feel sorrow for those women, and men too actually, who feel this abuse physically and mentally. You've done a great job of expressing what an abused person feels/thinks. Great job.
    -blt
    | Posted on 2005-04-03 00:00:00 | by borderlinetears | [ Reply to This ]
      You are a master of obscure metaphor and analogy. This is a fine example of that, comparing an abusive relationship to a cup of coffee. And it works too! This is a man who doesn't think about the effects of his actions. He'll set the dripping cup down flush against the table without concern for the damage it will do. He'll work to clean it up eventually, but only after permanent stains have set in.

    Great work as always Amy. Good to see you writing again.
    | Posted on 2005-04-03 00:00:00 | by deadndreaming | [ Reply to This ]
      I really hope that you're not in an abusive relationship. Seriously, you don't deserve it. I love the peice, and I've been there, so I can totally relate.

    The only other thing I can say is that if you're being abused, get out, no man is worth the pain he puts you through.

    Best wishes,
    Unicorn
    | Posted on 2005-04-03 00:00:00 | by Unicorn Poet | [ Reply to This ]
      is someone physically hurting you?ive never understood the barrered woman syndrome,where theystay for more.i like the corelations made in this piece

    toyysruss
    | Posted on 2005-04-03 00:00:00 | by toyysruss | [ Reply to This ]
      whoa. I'm not sure how to take this one. it's very intense and it seems to contain alot of hurt as well as abuse. I hope you have not been going through something like that, but if so, please get rid of him. you deserve much more. we all do. I hope you just made it up. the poem itself is excellent.
    | Posted on 2005-04-03 00:00:00 | by sierramuse8 | [ Reply to This ]


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