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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: all in the past nowdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: nwproud
    ASL Info:    27 / vancouver, wa
    Elite Ratio:    5.62 - 280/243/64
    Words: 218
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1006
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1505



    Description:
       how sad it seems that he wasted all your time, and by the time she noticed you after him, there was nothing left to her, she had no desire left to love.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsall in the past nowdots
    -------------------------------------------


    The meaning, it's gone,
    I no longer care to know.
    Ignorance is bliss,
    and bliss I'm smiling for.
    turn that flower round,
    questions of what's to be,
    so careful you were,
    to love not, rather than me.
    Words did not consume as badly,
    leastways, not as his kiss,
    the incompetence of others,
    responsible for that missed.
    What is it now, to offer,
    such a choice, for I've nothing.
    funny how what you give,
    lasts only until the morning.
    through all the mistakes,
    some still remain in question,
    you stare down the road,
    but not in the right direction.
    Do the letters seem to offer hope?
    As if those words mean a damn!
    you refuse to ever let them go,
    not convinced of the man I am.
    a vision shattered in the mind,
    no chance to ever be,
    I've turned my back on you,
    pretending I really don't see.
    How thoroughly you believe
    that you can make the difference,
    buts there's nothing to change,
    if love makes no sense.
    So before we reach that point,
    from which there's no return,
    know I wont take another step,
    There's nothing more to learn.
    I quit, for sake of my heart,
    the significance seems to fade,
    the love it seeks can't be found,
    I'll settle for the love I've made.





    Submitted on 2005-04-03 14:03:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      I really liked this poem. I think I'll make it a favorite. It describes what I went through with amy. Oh by the way amy is the one who most of my poems are about. I even have a poem titled Amy but it didn't get many comments I think only one. Anyways to get back to your poem. It hit hard reading this because I loved amy so much that I even tried to kill myself because I couldn't be with her. Not just that I couldn't go out with her but because she was the first person in 9 years that I could trust with anything and she was my best friend. I had to let go of her before I lost it again. My love for her went in two ways Love for how she made me feel and how much I cared for her and love for how much I could trust her with anything at all and knowing I could talk to her and feel better. I think it kinda made me realize that it's time to move on even though I still love her but I found out she was back at home from college and I couldn't see her. When she left I started to get anxiety attacks when I thought of her. for a week straight in the morning at work I would shake like I had parkinsons and couldn't do anything about it. I was full of energy and I was just losing my mind and couldn't keep my mind on anything. Well nice poem I know I didn't write as much as the others here. But I'm not much of a long writer never was but always got A's on my papers. Well I'll be reading more of your poems. BYe.
    | Posted on 2005-04-09 00:00:00 | by musclebound350 | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey nwproud

    I have read your poem a couple of times, to get a better picture of what you really wrote and I think it is quite interesting ;0) Interesting in the way you have chosen to write it and in the flow, but I think you could, if you really gave it some work, bring forward the essence of the poem and make the flow even more interesting. I think if you tried to remove some of the words and strengthen up the structure in the poem it could become even more interesting.

    Another thing I think is funny, is that you put Ignorance = not care, which I would say was not the same thing, because you can not care about a thing and still be conscience about it, but normally when people are ignorant they do not know what is wrong or do not know what it is all about ;0)

    I've turned my back on you,
    pretending I really don't see.

    You do care, but quit, for the sake of your heart ;0) You are not ignorant, but you just had enough, which is understandable ;0)

    Nice ;0)

    Keep writing ;0)

    KNS
    | Posted on 2005-04-05 00:00:00 | by KNS | [ Reply to This ]
      Tony,
    Once again, you have managed to capture my heart with the words that you write. This is, once again, a beautiful poem that I am very glad I read. I wasn't going to read it, sometimes your poems are so deep that I feel as though I shouldnt be able to know that much about you from a poem..like it is your own life and i am intruding. you have this way of putting yourself inside of your poems..making them more beautiful than i have ever seen a guy write. You are amazing. you are beautiful and I am so glad that i can call you my friend. You are amazing...and you know how you said how you wished a girl would read it and something would just happen inside her..well, it is as though i have let all intuition go as i read your poetry, and i am in the life you live..as though i am standing right beside you..I wish to get to know you better, to know the real you more and more each and every day. You still amaze me...actually you amaze me more and more as the days go by. you are incredible..i cant wait to read your next piece..AMAZING..
    | Posted on 2005-04-04 00:00:00 | by longwinterdays | [ Reply to This ]
      Well, that was smoehow really really interesting! I really must say that I am not sure whether I have read any of your posts before or not! I think I didn't! But anyway after reading this one I think I may try to read some of your other poems and may be watch out for your posts every now and then.

    And now about the poem; I really liked this one, I think that the topic was very beautiful, may be it is not totally new but the way it was presented was somehow innovative (at least to me), I mean that the way you described the whole situation and presented it was very good.

    About the panctuation, I really don't know! It seems a little bit over and more than required which might have took some of the beauty of the poem!

    I liked many parts of this poem, and I would like to state them, like the part that says

    "you stare down the road,
    but not in the right direction."

    I really loved this sentence! It really made me think alot!

    And also the part that says

    "a vision shattered in the mind,
    no chance to ever be,
    I've turned my back on you,
    pretending I really don't see"

    And also the finale was good

    "I quit, for sake of my heart,
    the significance seems to fade,
    the love it seeks can't be found,
    I'll settle for the love I've made."

    Anyway I hope that my comment was somehow helpful to you and I'll end up my comment saying Good luck and keep it up.

    P.S This poem reminded me of a line I used in one of my unposted poems that says

    "I gave up, but giving up doesnt mean Im weak, if you just know, It only means that Im strong enough to let go"
    | Posted on 2005-04-03 00:00:00 | by Yousef | [ Reply to This ]


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