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    dots Submission Name: left oversdots

    Author: brokenbatman
    Elite Ratio:    2.99 - 475/233/44
    Words: 143
    Class/Type: Poetry/Angry
    Total Views: 1274
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 907

       don't ask but please reply, just rambling

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsleft oversdots

    help to see the bottom
    of the pit of your stomach
    can't quite see it under the skin
    unable to ignore the squirming
    bile filled food sack bubbling
    rolling and tumbling around
    beneath your designer clothes
    forcing sweat beeds out of your forehead
    threatening to spill that taco salad
    or spew forth the diet coke
    regurgitation will purify your soul
    but ruin your bosses tie and shoes
    out out before body control fails
    weakness discovered by competition
    and with your dinner you lose your job
    take sanctuary in the throne room
    and pray to the porcelin god before you
    when it is all over and this memory fades
    remeber the view in this toilet
    you will not need to ask for help to see
    what lies at the bottom of your stomach
    you have left behind with a flush

    Submitted on 2004-04-03 01:01:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Hmmm, pretty cynical, but I like it it.

    An interesting metaphor, showing the real person under the outer costume, and the fact of reality in the comtents of the guts.

    Pretty graphic, but there's nothing wrong with that.

    Liked it, nicely different and strangely compelling

    be happy

    | Posted on 2006-02-19 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]
    batman, if there is message, i just don't get it... sometimes, when it's all metaphors, i zonk out... what is this about??
    | Posted on 2004-04-03 00:00:00 | by Judy | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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