Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • ES Magazine
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • Video Tutorials
  • RolePlay
  • 90% off Amazon
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Atomic Angeldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Paradox
    ASL Info:    25/m/Earthbound
    Elite Ratio:    4.04 - 647/352/64
    Words: 76
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 588
    Average Vote:    2.0000
    Bytes: 529



    Description:
       ...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAtomic Angeldots
    -------------------------------------------


    She has octopus eyelashes and an unlucky charm
    (I swear I saw motion itself giving me a wink)
    She has alien skin and an odorless smell
    (It's not that impossible really)
    She has silicon flesh
    (Artificial but true)
    She has honey blood
    (Actually it tastes rather bitter)
    She has phosphorescent hair and a halo
    (It’s easier to find her in the dark when drunk)
    She has eyes colored violet most violent of colors




    Submitted on 2005-04-13 12:25:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Very beautiful, In the description of the female, you point out the perfections in her "flaws" also the format was so well done, I think it's a lovely vacation from the usual format, and very pleasing to the eyes.

    Well-Done.
    ~Carrie
    | Posted on 2008-11-20 00:00:00 | by dismal_s child | [ Reply to This ]
      Again, I was drawn by the title. Very intriguing combination. I don't think I ever read something remotely similar to this. It astounds me because I deeply value the strict form of my own poems but like it when others use it otherwise. This is very expressive and vivid in color and atmosphere. I take it it's your vision of beauty if not a straightforward idea.
    | Posted on 2006-10-22 00:00:00 | by Porcelaine | [ Reply to This ]
      Intersting piece. Were you high when you wrote it! lol. No idea what it's about but very uintigued to find out. I loved the sahpe of the piece. Creepy write but very weel done.

    Kate xoxoxo
    | Posted on 2005-04-28 00:00:00 | by elephantasia | [ Reply to This ]
      LOL, orange...I thinks it's quite intriguing...what on earth does it mean? Well I guess it's okay...maybe...I don't know...keep writing...

    Desser
    | Posted on 2005-04-13 00:00:00 | by Desser | [ Reply to This ]
      First of all, you might want to fix the spelling of odor in line three. Second I don't know how this would come accross in Romonia, but it creeps this American out.
    | Posted on 2005-04-13 00:00:00 | by orange | [ Reply to This ]
      I love the image of this angel that I now have in my mind. I'm still trying to create "octopus eyelashes" in my mind, but that's not a bad thing. I think the shape of this poem is also extremely well done. The hour-glass shape makes me thing of mortality, something the brutal and demonic nature of your angel suggests.

    ~VanillaLeaves
    | Posted on 2005-06-16 00:00:00 | by VanillaLeaves | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    54385



    Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
    5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

    [ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

    Google
     

    [ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
    [ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .
    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry