My Unique Suicide by dancer06

I cant take it anymore.
Im about to walk out that door.
All my friends are not friends at all.
They will laugh as I fall.
I made my bed and now must lie in it.
All that work and what do I get?
I always feel so helpless
Like everything I do is a guess.
My soul was jerked away from me!
I should’ve charged them a fee,
For now my heart is cold and hard.
I guess I chose the wrong playing card.
All my problems start at school.
They taught me how to play the fool.
All my flaws are picked apart
Like banned books on a rusty cart.

I’m no longer a problem
And its all because of them
That I am lying on the floor,
And bleeding from the core.
I always come up short!
My thoughts I cannot sort.
I’m drowning all alone.
NO calls come from the phone!
I won’t ever call for you again.
I just couldn’t be your perfect ten.
I feel numb within myself.
I have no memories on my shelf.
My insides are ripped away
And nothing about me is ok.

I chose to take my life today.
I felt it was the only way.
I know you all want to take the vote.
Should I die by slitting my throat?
Or should I choose the pesticide
For my unique suicide?
I feel like a nasty bug
Something that no one wants to hug.
As all the thoughts drain from my head,
I realize I don’t want to be dead.
It was you I wanted to see die,
Because your whole life was a lie.
They say that its all sticks and stones
But it was your words that broke my bones.
What you thought was all fun,
Made me grab my dad’s hand gun.

What made you think you could do this?
You just had to take your deadly kiss.
After I’m dead no hearts will weep.
Friendship these days come so cheap.
I see someone standing over me.
Her face has no smile or glee.
Oh my God! What did I do?
My mom loves me and my dad too.
Did I make the wrong choice?
I yell but I have no voice!
I believe I have made a big mistake
My life is not mine to take!
A tear rolls down my cheek.
With blood pouring I don’t look chic.
My whole body is feeling cold.
My own life I am trying to hold.

As darkness begins to envelope,
My thoughts cannot develop.
When you feel so lost,
And your heart is frost
You wonder why you want to live.
You know that you have nothing to give.
It’s like trying to find a corner in a circle room.
You just kicked yourself into an early tomb.
Why did you make the choices you did?
Why did you have to lift the lid?
I took a bite of a forbidden fruit.
My own horn I had to toot.
No one was there to brag or boast.
No one at my funeral proposed a toast.
Backstabbers came to see me there,
In my casket and so bear.

In my memory I want to erase
All the problems I could not face.
All the preppy girls
With their head full of curls
That wept at the thought
That it was them I caught.
They know that they have caused my death.
They skinnied down by smoking the meth.
I hope they choke on Chinese rice.
Then maybe that would make them think twice.
I hope I haunt them in their sleep.
Through the darkness I WILL creep.
I wish to turn your feelings to blood
And let it run from you in a flood.
You thought that you were so good,
Concealing what you thought you could.

All the fun you had to poke.
It was your throat I wanted to choke.
Why must you do what you do?
You have sniffed too much glue.
My anger has to be released
For it has broken my weak leash.
Through you all I felt pain.
This lesson gave me nothing to gain.
My choice is now permanent.
It has pitched its tent.
What has been done is done,
And I chose to run.
But God has taken me under his wing.
At the top of my lungs I want to sing.
I’m here to fulfill my goal.
My anger has taken its toll.

By my tomb I hear them pray.
Under their breathes they do say
“My heart sings a mournful song,
Because what I did was really wrong.”
I laugh at them
Because they did not win.
But as realization comes to pass,
They feel like they are walking on glass.
All they had to do was be nice
Now they skate on very thin ice.
Put the pieces of the puzzle together.
We are all of one feather.

At my sad story children will whence,
But I know now, I made a difference.