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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Throughdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: fallenpopcorn10
    ASL Info:    18/vagina/california
    Elite Ratio:    2.1 - 78/111/38
    Words: 46
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 782
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 324



    Description:
       Still, not very good. I need some tips on how to make my "poetry" better.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThroughdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Pack up your problems
    say goodbye
    Jump

    Ready to leave,
    go to a new place
    bags are packed
    goodbyes are said
    life is now
    over.

    You're dead
    how does it feel?
    Life has ended
    the time I have been waiting for
    has come




    Submitted on 2005-04-15 18:25:40     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Sorry for my type o. I meant ...complete poet...Your poetry is most of the time influenced by other minds.Keep trying to separate yourself from that.
    DAlin
    | Posted on 2005-09-16 00:00:00 | by DAlin | [ Reply to This ]
      I really liked your poetry.I am not giving you any tips, becouse i saw that you are a complete pot, most of the times :). Anyway i hope i`m right.Keep it going, you do it well.

    DAlin
    | Posted on 2005-09-16 00:00:00 | by DAlin | [ Reply to This ]
      I don't think there is a problem with your poetry. I think that you have developed you own style, and the structure is fine. The wording works. Nicely done.
    | Posted on 2005-04-15 00:00:00 | by AngelOutlaw | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

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