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    dots Submission Name: beforedots

    Author: closetpoet
    Elite Ratio:    2.25 - 51/106/70
    Words: 100
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1467
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 670


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    before the moon was young
    and heaven danced with glee behind the sun
    the stars would dream of you
    to pierce a darkness you'd walk thru

    before the seas were blue;
    teamed with life, from which we grew
    waves would dance and bow
    imbued in love as long as time allowed

    before the sky held birds in flight
    parading clouds in daydream sight
    winds whispered longingly, your name
    with reverence, in refrain

    before your supple lips touched mine
    and ancient worlds fell, in decline
    He thought of how a love should be
    and made you simply....for me.

    Submitted on 2005-04-18 16:39:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I know this is way old......... But the oldies are the goodies! :)
    If this poem was to be placed next to some the greats over the last 200 years, anonymously;I think this poem would stand the test of time as well. It's fantastic. I know I sound silly, but really I mean that as sincerely as possible. I truly love this and thank you for sharing such love and am glad you never decided to unshare this.
    | Posted on 2016-03-14 00:00:00 | by Chelebel | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked it. The first stanza is good so I kept reading. There were nice images and strong emotions. I liked the last stanza the best, it is almost like a prayer of thanks.
    | Posted on 2005-04-26 00:00:00 | by Silverdog | [ Reply to This ]
      This is so sweet and so beautiful, it almost brings tears to my eyes! I wish a guy would feel this way about me and write something like this for me, sigh...
    | Posted on 2005-04-18 00:00:00 | by psycho_1 | [ Reply to This ]
      Impressive. I love the images you use. The third stanza is my favorite. My honest opinion is the poem is too long though. I'd like it better if it was just the last two stanzas.
    I'd say the poem isn't quite all it could be, but with a revision this could be a very powerful piece of poetry. I like the soft religiosity. Although a lot of people don't believe in god there is something with religion in love and poetry that appeals to everyone.
    | Posted on 2005-04-18 00:00:00 | by Cindergarden1 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is really good, I love how the whole thing flows and the words you used. The only thing wrong I can see is that you spelled a few things wrong. Other then that it's perfect!
    | Posted on 2005-04-18 00:00:00 | by Akili | [ Reply to This ]

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