hey hey nils, im speechless, gosh. Please tell me theres a melody to this one. Only one thing I saw in ur piece that I think you should change:
-I'll give you the lungs To blow life into me
I dont know how you could reword this but it doewsnt sound right to me...
*reading it over and over*
Ahhhhhh, nix that last comment. Its fine. I wanna put a tune to it..will be a challenge matching a melody to such powerful words! ps: to answer your question..love comes with pain, for without pain thered be no compassion
oh my freakin god.,.. i just love this.. i swear i fell in love with this poem!! WONDERFUL MARVELOUS JOB!! im amazed.. seriously congratulations.. its soooo good im gonna add it to my faves!!! xoxo great job byess! *anita*
I love this. I have never read anything by you before, and this certainly left an impression on me. It reminds me of something Trent Reznor of Nine Inch Nails might sing about. I don't know if you would take that as a compliment, but that is the first thing I thought about. I loved your form, and the refraining. Powerful piece. Hope to see more, Samantha
oh wow...this is definitely going into my favs..this is really good...in a way it held both a romantic and dark impression on me...well, because you give this girl everything you have...for both ways...
"You gave me a heart To beat sense out of me You gave me the knees to beg on The palms to ask you please"
This is one in a million-you gave me a heart..The palms to ask you please...brillant.
I couldn't have come close to describing painful love as you did...really wonderful poem... Thanky for sharing this piece, it's amazingly wonderful...