It was mid-July. It had been a few months of my mother taking care of me alone and she started coming undone. My mother had never been one to handle stress well, but she had really reached the end of her rope. I would ask her over and over when daddy was coming home, and it seemed to upset her just as much as it upset me that she couldn’t answer. I don’t know honey. He’ll be back when he wants to be. That’s where her big mistake was. When he wants to be. After her saying this numerous times I came to believe that he hadn’t returned not because he didn’t want to be home, but because he didn’t want me.
This is when my self-hatred started. But it wasn’t just a feeling; it turned into actions as well. It began with simple things, like me bashing my head against the shag-carpeted floor of my room. But it rapidly escalated to hair pulling, punching myself, and then came that fateful day that alerted my mother that I needed professional help to deal with this…
Submission Name: Past My Expiration Date- Pt. 2
