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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Breathdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: slybee22
    ASL Info:    20
    Elite Ratio:    5.59 - 93/64/27
    Words: 325
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 234
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1826



    Description:
       well I wrote a respond to my last poem
    and this is what the end product is.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots Breathdots
    -------------------------------------------


    constipation of the soul, or rather like suffocating, feeling no pain ment no reason to cry, but now death in nearing. it feels as if my soul is callapsing in, breath , breath I'v forgotten how to breath. breath , breath! I am ready to breath.

    I just want to breath again ,
    I'm ready to breath again,
    today I'm ready to breath again,
    Ready to breath again.


    Looking back I remember feeling guilty for being happy , now I'm like what ever the pleasure that I felt was far more than the pain.
    I was so happy and in love with life cause life loved me.
    now that my love and my life has gone away,
    I'd would do anything to go back and undo that day.

    I just want to breath again ,
    I'm ready to breath again,
    today I'm ready to breath again,
    Ready to breath again.

    I stopped singing because when I sang a tear fell for every word. Whenever they would echo through my mind I would drown them with the enticements of the new world. My emotions no longer bleeding from my soul nor did they seeping from my mind or fall from my lips in the form of words not in any form.

    I just want to breath again ,
    I'm ready to breath again,
    today I'm ready to breath again,
    let me remember how to breath again.

    This life has me drained, so all my efforts are now strained.I don’t feel happy or sad and I hardly ever get mad.
    I just wish that I could go back in time to reclaim the life that was once mine.

    I just want to breath again ,
    I'm ready to breath again,
    today I'm ready to breath again,
    oh let me remember how to breath again.






    Submitted on 2005-04-21 13:34:58     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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