Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • ES Magazine
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • Video Tutorials
  • RolePlay
  • 90% off Amazon
  • Funny Pics
    • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
    • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: These Webs #1(edited)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: darkened_soul
    Elite Ratio:    3.38 - 812/868/171
    Words: 85
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 449
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 474



    Description:
       I had previous posted a three-part series of poetry called these webs, and I decided to re-edit them. This is the first piece.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThese Webs #1(edited)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I get entangled and I get lost
    I get thrown and I get tossed
    I get beat, and I get used
    I get hurt, and I get abused.

    But I leave you not, my dear
    But things won't change, I fear
    I'll end up hurt, maybe even dead
    If I upset you a bullet in my head.

    I am in anger, and so much pain
    Like the thunder and the rain
    So entangled in webs I shall stay
    Until you finally go away.




    Submitted on 2005-04-22 14:14:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      first part was genious i think,if it would have continued in the same track.one of the best i would have probably read
    one mans opinion

    wes all toyysruss
    | Posted on 2005-04-22 00:00:00 | by toyysruss | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the repetition for effect in the first stanza, but it's a bit TOO much to me. Otherwise, a nice piece for its length. Imagery is intense. Keep it up!

    Sarah
    | Posted on 2005-04-22 00:00:00 | by Deadly Sauce | [ Reply to This ]



    Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
    5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

    [ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

    Google
     

    [ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
    [ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .
    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry
    This user has been inactive for more than 5 days.