[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Endless Nightdots

    Author: DonKB
    ASL Info:    34/m/goergia
    Elite Ratio:    3.33 - 19/17/11
    Words: 112
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 1123
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 745

       This is about the things in our lifes that we just can't change but wish we could. Please give me your vote on this!

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsEndless Nightdots

    I toss and turn within the night,
    From these countless flights,
    Of ever changing rhythm schemes,
    That plaque me when I dream.
    The ever changing madness,
    Which causes all my sadness,
    From which I try to hide,
    But it''s always by my side.
    Over and over it play''s again,
    like a movie that never ends,
    The haunting of my past,
    Has finally caught up at last.
    For all the words it harks,
    And the whispers in the dark,
    Find me trembling with fear,
    And shedding all my tears.
    So I lie there with my eyes open,
    Neverknowing only hoping,
    That the visions that I see,
    will one day not visit me.

    Submitted on 2005-04-28 12:51:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      The haunting of my past...
    Well lets see.. One of the most perfect lines in any of your works, In my own little mind. That right there is when you should of just stopped, that's right, just stopped, really couldn't have put it into better words myself'the haunting of my past', NICE
    | Posted on 2005-05-01 00:00:00 | by childs | [ Reply to This ]
      oh, i like this a lot..very good.
    the only things i noticed are...
    never knowing,
    only hoping
    never knowing...only hoping.
    if seperated i think it would sound/read better.
    and then....
    That the visions I see...
    the other 'that' takes from the way that sentence sounds and is unnessecary. i read it over a few times to make sure. but this is excellent i loved it and am waiting for your next submission.
    | Posted on 2005-04-30 00:00:00 | by C. Starr | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Giving written by jjd
    Linger written by saartha
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Whiteout written by layDsayD
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    This written by Chelebel
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To written by SavedDragon
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Bond written by saartha
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Wavelength written by saartha




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]