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    dots Submission Name: B.O.B.dots

    Author: C. Starr
    ASL Info:    35/yesplz/State of denial
    Elite Ratio:    4.22 - 130/196/68
    Words: 192
    Class/Type: Poetry/Comedy
    Total Views: 1307
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1145

       Again..this is a new one.....written about 3 weeks ago.

    Actually this is dedicated to LameMansTerms.....he and his poem 'My Lover' inspired me. Hehe.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Bob....he's pretty good to me,
    He never pisses on the toilet seat.
    He doesn't ever go throw dollars at a stripper,
    But he's also not a very good tipper.
    In fact...he never even pays for dinner,
    Yet...in my book, he's still a winner.
    He'll never cheat on me with my sister,
    Or try to show me a boil or a blister.
    Bob...he's about the greatest for a girl like me,
    I can be pleased repeatedly...no worries of disease.
    There are a few issues, like he doesn't bring home any dough,
    But...he does have 3 settings..fast, medium and slow.
    He gets me excited, puffs me up and makes me wet,
    And he'll get me off every... single time, on that you can bet.
    I just hope he doesn't get jealous of the other dildos,
    But see...that's the beautiful part...a fake dick can't possess an ego.
    He's my....
    B. attery O. perated B. oyfriend don't you see ?
    And no matter who sleeps in my bed....I'll be with him for all eternity.

    Submitted on 2005-04-29 05:11:31     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Oh dear. Today has had a very odd start. I seem to be reading odes to vibrators :))) First Munchie, then Brownsdelight, then Stolie - and now this. And its not even midday here...

    B.O.B. is GREAT :)

    I hereby proclaim Fridays 'Midget/Dildo Day' :) LOL

    Sorry if Im being all crazy, Im a bit sleep-deprived and not totally 'with it', as it were :)

    | Posted on 2005-05-13 00:00:00 | by Katia | [ Reply to This ]
      stw told me about this poem, but I had no idea what it was really about until I read it. It wasn't what I was expecting, because he only said it was about the perfect man, or something. He referred me to this one because I wrote a poem about a perfect man, only it's about an actual person, not a toy, lol. If you want to read it, it's called "To Whom it may Concern:"
    | Posted on 2005-05-05 00:00:00 | by Amberdy | [ Reply to This ]
      Ah, but BOB won't give you kisses, hold you when you need it most, listen to all your boring stories . . . hell! What am I saying? Most of us guys won't either! hahahaaa.

    As a fan of Lame's RL, I thought this was a nice response . . . vis a vis!
    | Posted on 2005-05-04 00:00:00 | by Vancrown | [ Reply to This ]
      oh my fuuuukn god you...you...you wrote a rubber lover...BOB-holy [censored] this was really good and zas I read it -it even read kind of like mine -you are way too funny. No wonder you kept telling me to come read it. I am so sorry it took me this long but it was nice to see myself mentioned in the comments previous. WOW I don't know what to say about this -I mean what do you say when someone writes you a dedication or what have you? Thank You so much -just doesn't seem to do it.
    Isn't it difficult to write in a way because you have to maintainyour seriousness yet in your mind your saying my god this is so silly.
         "B.O.B" and "My Rubber Lover"
    .sp8. forever

    thanks -I never had a poem dedicated to me before. It's really cool.(I'm such a dork)
    | Posted on 2005-05-04 00:00:00 | by LameMansTerms | [ Reply to This ]
      haha this made me laugh...not an easy feat on a monday morning, you know? anyways...
    I have always loved LameMansTerms writing, it is very creative and good for some laughs, especially his Cartoon Gigolo lol ...This was just very humorous, and the twist at the end of the piece just put a huge smile on my face lol...I have to go to my next class, I will check out more stuff when I get a chance.

    | Posted on 2005-05-02 00:00:00 | by xeternalshadowx | [ Reply to This ]
      LOL :) That's great, I was gonna tell you my next poem involves a guy named Bob, but now I don't think I'm gonna :P...This was different and had a surpise/twist of irony/type of deal :)

    Good write, made me laff :P

    keep writing! :)

    | Posted on 2005-04-30 00:00:00 | by Stwcjj | [ Reply to This ]
      hahaha. Loved the humor. Thank goodness for all the bobs in the world. I invite him over , even when my boyfriend comes to vistit me (hhahaha) okay I am being sick.
    Thanks for sharing
    | Posted on 2005-04-29 00:00:00 | by screams | [ Reply to This ]
      This is pretty funny, although I am taking a much different approach in my response than on1eday.co.uk did, it made me laugh. This si short and sweet but I'm in a hurry, class is starting soon, sorry.
    | Posted on 2005-04-29 00:00:00 | by UnspokenDreamer | [ Reply to This ]
      i am a fu-cking sex god.
    i have a 12" john.
    i know what to do with it.
    i stick it in a circle it around and the chicks fu-cking love me.
    they know i am the daddy.
    i hit all theright buttons, and the ones they thought they did not have.
    i have stiffies for hours at a time.
    when i have shot my load i go right back for more action.
    i even kiss them afterwards and tell the chicks i love them.

    you dont need bob.
    | Posted on 2005-04-29 00:00:00 | by on1eday.co.uk | [ Reply to This ]
      Lameman will be so proud! I love his "Rubber Lover" piece. This was clever indeed. I love how you have B.O.B possibly becoming jealous of the other dildo's at the end- men are always afraid that we are going to love our toys more than them, be replaced by B.O.B. so I think it was funny that even thought your B.O.B is perfect in every other way, he is not immune to those male misgivings. HEe hee. Magnolia
    | Posted on 2005-04-29 00:00:00 | by Magnolia | [ Reply to This ]
      Out random I went to comedy poems and now I'm glad that I did. This poem is the best. I told my friend about 'Bob' and she just started to laugh her ass off. Great job on this poem, it made my day.

    | Posted on 2005-05-25 00:00:00 | by Destined | [ Reply to This ]

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