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expectations of the living expectations of the dead if this should ever cease i shall never be filled with dread o would that be a dream come true for you never to expect of me again for you to let me be be myself not somebody you expect me to be when all these expectations fill my head i truely wish i were dead rather then to be filled with dread |
nice rymes the last few lines were the best! they rymed really cool and the beging was also very emotionfull im still like whoa... Trevor...~ | Posted on 2006-03-14 00:00:00 | by goomaster03 | [ Reply to This ] | This is quite morbid! It's a good attempt though, i think your use of repetition really helps to hammer your points home. And your spelling is fine as far as i can see: except for 'then' in the last line should be 'than'. | Also i would look again at the lines 'if this should ever cease/ i shall never be filled with dread' - that confused me a bit on the first read through. I think 'i should not be filled with dread' would work better and be clearer. Don't let ppl's expectations get to you! Take care and keep writing xxx | Posted on 2005-05-04 00:00:00 | by tulip | [ Reply to This ] | this was such an awesome poem...expectations...whoah | thats a good topic to write on as well the format of ur poem like rhyming/not rhyming...i dont know it just sounded kinda kool. | Posted on 2005-04-30 00:00:00 | by UnPerfect | [ Reply to This ] | |