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    dots Submission Name: All arounddots

    Author: Rail
    ASL Info:    18-m-Washinton state
    Elite Ratio:    2.27 - 117/80/13
    Words: 37
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 787
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 229

       Just something else I wrote when I was bored I'll probly add more to it latter.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAll arounddots

    All around there is no light.
    It is the dead of night.
    and I'm in quite a plite.

    The people run in fright.
    It's with grate spite.
    That I fight those who kill with such delight.

    Submitted on 2005-05-01 17:15:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      This is really good. I like the fact that it is short yet is makes you think. The only thing i would think about changing are some of the rhymes. But other than that once again well done.

    | Posted on 2005-05-02 00:00:00 | by Selene | [ Reply to This ]
      interesting... and you know how much i like interesting things . its realy tiny but i'm sure you'll find something elce to say. though it is a bit confusing. if pplz are running in fright and you are seeking out murderers or something then why are you in a plite? ack! oh and you spelled great like a cheese grater and if they are killing ppl with cheese grater they ARE messed up. lol.
    *toodles off to get cookies*
    | Posted on 2005-05-02 00:00:00 | by Saphire Twiligh | [ Reply to This ]
      this is a good begining but you do need to add more to it than it should be grea if you keep up the good work. hope to hear from you.
    | Posted on 2005-05-01 00:00:00 | by theman | [ Reply to This ]
      yah u need to add more but its a good beginning it could turn into a poem with a story in it
    Darkness of the Grim Draco
    | Posted on 2005-05-01 00:00:00 | by darkness | [ Reply to This ]
      I think this was really good. The whole thing flowed really well together. The only thing that confused me was the 2 to last line, maybe it's just becuse I'm really tired but I didn't make any sense out of it. Other then that, keep up the great work!
    | Posted on 2005-05-01 00:00:00 | by Akili | [ Reply to This ]

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