Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: All arounddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Rail
    ASL Info:    18-m-Washinton state
    Elite Ratio:    2.27 - 117/80/13
    Words: 37
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 797
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 229



    Description:
       Just something else I wrote when I was bored I'll probly add more to it latter.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAll arounddots
    -------------------------------------------


    All around there is no light.
    It is the dead of night.
    and I'm in quite a plite.

    The people run in fright.
    It's with grate spite.
    That I fight those who kill with such delight.




    Submitted on 2005-05-01 17:15:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is really good. I like the fact that it is short yet is makes you think. The only thing i would think about changing are some of the rhymes. But other than that once again well done.

    Selene
    | Posted on 2005-05-02 00:00:00 | by Selene | [ Reply to This ]
      interesting... and you know how much i like interesting things . its realy tiny but i'm sure you'll find something elce to say. though it is a bit confusing. if pplz are running in fright and you are seeking out murderers or something then why are you in a plite? ack! oh and you spelled great like a cheese grater and if they are killing ppl with cheese grater they ARE messed up. lol.
    *toodles off to get cookies*
    mheracai
    | Posted on 2005-05-02 00:00:00 | by Saphire Twiligh | [ Reply to This ]
      this is a good begining but you do need to add more to it than it should be grea if you keep up the good work. hope to hear from you.
    | Posted on 2005-05-01 00:00:00 | by theman | [ Reply to This ]
      yah u need to add more but its a good beginning it could turn into a poem with a story in it
    R.I.P
    Darkness of the Grim Draco
    | Posted on 2005-05-01 00:00:00 | by darkness | [ Reply to This ]
      I think this was really good. The whole thing flowed really well together. The only thing that confused me was the 2 to last line, maybe it's just becuse I'm really tired but I didn't make any sense out of it. Other then that, keep up the great work!
    | Posted on 2005-05-01 00:00:00 | by Akili | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    56995

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    untitled written by ShyOne
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    Dream written by closetpoet
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Carry written by saartha
    Redemption written by poetotoe
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    Records I written by Raphael
    Relativity written by poetotoe
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    The World written by jjd
    Shi written by ShyOne

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry